1. Lucille Ball
Not only is Lucille Ball one of the most influential comedians of all time, but she’s also a total BAMF. When Lucy got a deal for her own TV show, she insisted that her Cuban husband, Desi Arnaz, play her husband on the show. People were pissed (cause rasicts be trippin’) but Lucy fought until she got her way. Get it Lucy!
2. Sarah Silverman
Sure, lots of people think Sarah is an unfunny obnoxious jerk…but those people don’t understand satire and have never seen Baby Penis In Your Mind. For your viewing pleasure: http://www.comedycentral.com/video-clips/3yfavs/the-sarah-silverman-program-the-baby-penis-in-your-mind
3. Gilda Radner
She was an original cast member of Saturday Night Live, made iconic characters like Roseanne Roseannadanna, raised awareness of ovarian cancer, AND married Willy Wonka.
4. Tina Fey
Tina F*cking Fey. Her badassness comes from the fact that she’s a goddess, but also because she was knifed by a stranger at the age of 5. If you don’t like Tina Fey, may you burn in that fiery place with the people who make rape jokes and punch kittens.
5. Wanda Sykes
“Seriously, I don’t need a gun. I’m easily annoyed. I would shoot people in my house that I invited over.” Wanda gets me.
6. Melissa McCarthy
Melissa’s character in Bridesmaids was so badass, she was nominated for an Academy Award. She could have a movie about dogs pooping and I’d still want to watch it. I’m currently on a mission to become this woman’s best friend.
7. Phyllis Diller
Phyllis Diller is THE original gangster. Girlfriend didn’t even start her career in comedy until she was a 37-year-old mother of 5, and she might be the most important female comedian of all time. There wouldn’t be a Tina Fey if it weren’t for Phyllis Diller.
8. Kristen Wiig
This woman got to have her boob squeezed my Jon Hamm. As if that didn’t make her badass enough, she pretty much saved SNL in her last season. Not only was she the strongest female (sorry Vanessa Bayer), but she’s living proof that women can be funny and totally super shmexy.
9. Betty White
I don’t think this one needs an explanation. http://www.hulu.com/watch/147961. (shout out to two bad bitches Ana Gasteyer and Molly Shannon).
10. Whoopi Goldberg
Sister Act would have been enough to get her on this list. But how can we forget Ghost (Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress), The Color Purple, Sister Act 2 and Rat Race!? She was the first woman to host the Oscars without a co-host, and she was so kickass that she hosted 2 more times. And her stage name came from whoopee cushions: “If you get a little gassy, you’ve got to let it go.”
11. Amy Poehler
Amy is basically like another Tina Fey, except blonde. And she’s a better rapper than Lil‘ Wayne and 2 Chainz (<—wtf?) combined. Don’t believe me? http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/update-palin-rap/n12327/
12. Lisa Kudrow
Lisa Kudrow is totally underrated. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Rachel Green…but Phoebe Buffay might be the single greatest TV character of all time. If Smelly Cat didn’t define your life in the 90’s, you don’t know true genius.
13. Honorable Mention: Nicki Minaj
People. Pay attention. Nicki is not a singer or a rapper. She is a comedian. GET WITH IT. The sooner we accept this, the sooner she will be recognized for her true genius. Which is comedy. And not music.