10 Things Writers Are Tired Of Hearing

You're tired from waking up early (or staying up late) to work on your novel or your poems or your book of essays. But you're also tired of having to respond to people who say crap like this when you tell them "I'm a writer."

1. Do you make any money doing that?

Of course not. Why are you reminding me?

2. When does your book come out?

Maybe never? I haven't even found an agent yet!

3. Oh, I have a great story for you...

You could write it yourself...but no, now you're going to tell me about it.

4. You should write about me!

Will do, Old Sport, will do.

5. Cool. You know, J.K. Rowling is a millionaire.

Yes, I know! But I'm not exactly there yet.

6. What's your novel about?

It's um... Well, it makes sense in my head.

7. You have your MFA? What's that do?

A Master of Fine Arts. It helped teach me to write and drained all my savings and...never mind.

8. Have you ever considered being a journalist?

No...That's not the type of writing I do, OK?

9. But what's your real job?

WRITING IS A REAL JOB!

10. Really? Nobody reads books anymore.

NOOOOO! Don't tell me that!!