As any sports fan will tell you, Philadelphia is know for its fans. The reputation is well deserved, I won't argue with you there. We are in fact a little nuts, did you know we had a courtroom slash jail at Eagle's stadium? Plus tasers! But you see, this is all completely understandable. It's not easy being so loyal and passionate when your teams can be, let's face it, downright frustrating. Yet, we will never waiver because we are the greatest sports fans around. Take that New York.
I hate basketball, it's the worst sport ever and I blame the 76ers. Who even are they? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Ok I'm sorry that was mean. For the purpose of this declaration of Philadelphia sports fandom there is not enough drama rama in the world of the 76ers for them to be a part of what I am now coining the nutso trifecta of fans. By drama I mean the fans don't get feisty. It's like a suburb of Philly or something. They have produced nothing of note ever and I shall disregard them when considering the life of a Phan. Can I trademark that? Is that already a thing? I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU ALL PHANS.
Part 1 of the nutso trifecta of fans (Phans, hehe) are the lovers of hockey. Hockey is a hard hitting sport to begin with. Now the Flyers aren't terrible, they have garnered some success over the years. Peter Laviolette is a decent coach and Danny Briere is just the cutest, so point for the Flyers on that one. Plus all the fights make Flyers games so much fun to watch. With this being said, they haven't had a decent goaltender in 30 years. UGH IT MAKES ME WANT TO RIP MY HAIR OUT. But we still watch, we never lose faith. We're true orange? Bam.
Part 2, the Eagles. Oh Eagles. Maybe just maybe this will be our year. We have finally gotten rid of Andy Reid, no offense bud but it was time. Then again choke is Philadelphia sports' middle name. The Eagles always find a way to fly into my heart. Sorry. You gotta love 'em, I mean haven't you seen Invincible? They're legendary and they'll continue to fill the seats. Once a Phan always a Phan.
Last but not least, the Phillies. Part 3. I'm partial to baseball, it's always been my favorite sport. The Phillies know how to make for real nail biters. Blowing a lead is their specialty, in fact if you want a great drinking game take a shot every time Charlie Manuel changes pitchers after the sixth inning. Remember that time when he ran out of pitchers and had to use Wilson Valdez, the shortstop? Moments like these make Citizens Bank Park a great place to be. You can never really bet on the outcome, but we Phans have come to appreciate the unpredictable.
Sometimes the going gets real tough as a Phan. Hope can briefly be lost in a moment of serious frustration with our teams, and it can make us, well, nutso. We're still going strong though because despite the reputation Phans have, Philadelphia is all about that brotherly love.
PS: here's a special shoutout to the greatest mascot in the history of mascots, the Phillie Phanatic
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