The 19 Stages Of Drunk Eating

We’ve all been there.

1. 1. You decide it’s time to leave the bar

2. 2. You make sure your friends are on board

3. 3. Although it won’t matter, you’re not above going alone

4. 4. Next you make the crucial decision of where to go

At this point you’ve already surrendered to the calories, so they better be MINDBLOWING.

5. 5. And annoy whatever poor (and semi-creepy) soul is working at that hour

6. 6. You order one of everything. Because you need it, really.

7. 7. Then pay the bill…

Which will hurt worse tomorrow..

8. 8. You impatiently wait in line while the food cooks

9. 9. You accidentally (or blatantly) use too much of the hot sauce they warned you about

10. 10. But still manage to ravage through every delicious bite


11. 11. You have a moment of celebratory reflection

“That was absolutely the best meal I’ve ever eaten…EVER.”

12. 12. Get home and pass out immediately

13. 13. You wake up the next morning…

14. 14. Quickly replay the way the evening unfolded

Oh no, did that really happen?! It wasn’t that bad, right?

15. 15. Hate yourself

16. 16. Drink a gallon of water


17. 17. Ponder the gym…

The thought is excruciating

18. 18. Quickly dismiss that idea

There’s absolutely no way.

19. 19. Head to the nearest diner

Grease is the only cure for what you’re experiencing.

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