1. Women run the world (thanks to Beyonce I assume).
And it only took one hundred and twenty years to go from “Ruler of the Earth” to the dissolution of thousands of years of social norms. Not bad for five generation’s worth of work.
2. Two hundred years later, women were fighter pilots. GASP! The gall!
And rough-housing with sports while the men could do nothing but watch them on circular televisions from the safety of the living room while quietly weeping at their lack of societal dominance.
3. Then, the worst horror of all was visited upon men. DOMESTIC. HOUSEKEEPING.
What cruel tyrannical monsters are women? Making men use the vacuum? Outrageous!
4. Naturally women would make the Rocket Cadets school dress code hot pants and fishnets.
When forming a society, women should always be objectified, even if it must be done by their peers. It’s the rule.
5. Also, it deters the MEN from joining.
Look at him, in his skimpy hot pants and fishnets. So emasculated.
6. In the future, women will have found a way to immunize humans from electrical shock.
By electrically shocking
men people. Because that’s a completely valid science and not at all an excuse to torture undesirables.
7. Women are strict taskmasters. No one could be expected to run on a sprained ankle.
Stella’s lucky her squad mates didn’t put her down like a dog.
8. Wait, wait, wait. The electrical shock immunity worked!?
Stella had to be saved…by a man. Ewwwww. The women have finally slipped up. It’s only a matter of time now.
- Robert L. Dear was identified as the suspected gunman in a fatal shooting at a Planned Parenthood in Colorado Springs. ›
- World leaders will meet in Paris starting Monday to discuss a potential global climate change agreement. Here's what you need to know. ›
- And how well do you know what happened in the news this week? Take our quiz. ›