The Animal Kingdom's 10 Strangest Penises

Damn nature, you kinky. And kind of freaking me out. Bed bug sex might be the most traumatizing thing you'll learn today. NSFW if your boss hates National Geographic specials.

• 1. Dolphins

• 2. Barnacle

• 3. The Leopard Slug

• 4. The Common House Cat

• 5. The Angler Fish

• 6. Duck

• 7. Spiny Anteater

• 8. The FEMALE Hyena

• 9. Amazingly, I could not find video for Bed Bug or Octopus Sex (with detachable penis). Internet, I am disappoint.

• 10. Bed Bugs

  

  Born with no female sex organs, bed bugs mate by using their penis like a hammer. A pointy hammer. Males just truck on in there and stab a hole somewhere in the lady's abdominal region. It's called traumatic insemination.

• 11. Paper Nautilus Octopus

  

  Girls are gross and you should never touch them. Instead, fill one of your tentacles with sperm and detach it from your body. She will absorb it into her own and you'll be cootie free.