THE 8 BEST NSFW CHRISTMAS SONGS

Here's a collection of Christmas Songs that you won't hear in the mall or on that all Christmas Radio station that your Mom is listening to.

OUSE VALLEY BAND's "Christmas Single (Prostitute For Xmas)

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"We'll do it doggy in the glow of the gas fire"

PATENT PENDING'S "She's a Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas"

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"With a bottle in her hands and with her legs around a man,

Is how she's probably spending Christmas this year."

THE VANDALS' "Christmas Time for my Penis"

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"I love you so much that it's hard,

to repay you for all the good times

we'll get whores and pornography-

your special holiday, pal..."

VEGAS DeMILO'S "SEX TOYS FOR CHRISTMAS"

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"Santa's Little Helper ain't so little anymore"

VINNIE and THE STARDUSTERS "I SAW MOMMY FISTING SANTA CLAUS"

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"Twisting Cheek to Cheek"

JIMMY BUTLER'S "TRIM YOUR TREE"

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"I’m gonna bring along my hatchet, my beautiful Christmas balls, I’ll sprinkle my snow up on your tree and hang my mistletoe on your wall"

DENIS LEARY'S "MERRY F%*KING CHRISTMAS"

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"Cracklin' fires to keep me warm

And my collection of asian porn

Cradle my bells and work my horn"

KYLE DUNNIGAN'S "F%*k YOU MISTLETOE"

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The Brokeback Mountain of Xmas tunes