Types Of Customers At Trader Joe's

You love the store but the employees don't always love you

The paranoid bagger

"I want every item individually wrapped and put in two triple paper bags with double plastic inside"

The bring your own bag raffle cheater

Yes you stuck that cliff bar in your purse, BUT ALL YOUR OTHER GROCERIES ARE IN OUR PAPER BAGS.

The dog walker

"I swear my dog is a service animal. By the way he pee'd in the frozen aisle."

The returner

I totally believe you bought this $20 unopened can of coffee even though you don't have a receipt. Interesting, our only missing item is that can of coffee.

The line cutter

[Note: this really only applies to the New York City stores]

"Oh the line starts in produce? Oh it's a 15 minute wait? Well maybe I'll just sneak in closer to the front." Have fun being yelled at by every other customer on line and getting dejected by a manager.

The Tourist

"I WANT TO BUY ALL THE BAGS AND SPICE GRINDERS!"

The reseller

"I just really really love cookie butter."

So that's why you're buying 5 cases. Can't wait to see them on amazon for $15 a pop

The sample stealer

I see you took 12 samples. Yes our samples are delicious but the other customers would like some too.

The arguer

"I JUST BOUGHT YOUR VALENCIA PEANUT BUTTER LAST WEEK! HOW ARE YOU OUT??"

Actually it was recalled over a year ago, sir.

The regular

No I don't find it weird that you come in every day and wait on the super long line just for a bag of potato chips. Not at all

The complainer

"Hi how are you doing"

"Terribly. The line was long, you were out of almond butter, and my sciatica is acting up. Also my son hasn't called me back in two weeks... blah blah blah."

I'm your cashier, not your therapist

The trendy dieter

"Where are your gluten free crackers?" "Is this meat gluten-free?" "Which of your yogurts don't contain gluten?"