1. From a workplace notepad.
2. Break a leg, we don’t give a crap.
3. Yes, of course we have an “E.R.” in our “hospital.”
4. You know what — I’m just going to go shit somewhere else.
5. Fake IDs only, please.
6. Actually, these quotes are “correct”
That’s because the good doctor Everett was delivering a lecture about how sexual assault is not a real issue on college campuses or the nation in general. Read the story on Jezebel.
7. “Mr. No One Else, please report to the staff room.”
8. …what you call “Valuables,” you poor, poor person.
9. Well, at least “Hi” is correct.
10. That’s really one word I NEVER want to see in quotes.
11. Gun store mocks self, LOL.
- A boat packed with mainly African migrants bound for Italy sank off the Libyan coast on Thursday and officials fear over 100 people might have died, Reuters reports. ›
- President Obama marked a decade of recovery after Hurricane Katrina, citing gains, but also the immense amount of work that he said still needs to be done. ›
- Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg said (on Faceboook, obviously) that one billion people used the service on Monday 🌐 ›