Promoted

Awkward Phallic Symbols

10 photos + 1 video.

1. Ad for Naples Lumber via Florida.

2. Hey, 2 bones is a bargain for a “rocket” sweater.

4. This has something to do with nerds and science fiction and I’m too busy to actually research it. But PENIS SHIP.

5. The ejaculating volcano just adds to the wrongness.

6. They had to name it that.

7. It’s just a long, hard, pointy shoe, move on.

8. Yes cheerleader Mom, GO MEAT.

9. Nice logo, Dr. WOOD (L — semi-erect, R — fully erect).

10. Lastly, I had to include this Internet-famous Chiquita poster because I STILL can not believe it was a real ad (which it most definitely was).

BONUS: It’s an 8+ minute video of a man wearing a green bag over his head and purple socks making love to a huge Cheeto made out of hundreds of little Cheetos while chanting/singing “I love you Cheetos” over and over and over to an annoying techno track.

11. NOTE:


About half of these are via The Blog of Unnecessary Phallic Symbols, who haven’t published an update since May 30th, which perturbs me.

Check out more articles on BuzzFeed.com!

 
  Your Reaction?
  REACT WITH GIF
 

    Contributions

    Here Are The Top Stories
    • More debris – believed to be part of the missing aircraft MH370 – has been found washed up on the Indian Ocean island of Réunion on Sunday.
    • Cilla Black, the legendary English singer and TV star, has died at her home in Spain, according to local police. She was 72 years old.
    • A conservation group at Oxford University told BuzzFeed News that media reports of Jericho's death were not true and that the 11-year-old lion was "alive and well".
    Get The News App

    Hot Buzz

    Show Us Your “Game Of Thrones”-Inspired Tattoos!

    collection

    What’s Your All-Time Favourite Quote From “The Simpsons”?

    collection

    Now Buzzing