2. Hey, 2 bones is a bargain for a “rocket” sweater.
4. This has something to do with nerds and science fiction and I’m too busy to actually research it. But PENIS SHIP.
5. The ejaculating volcano just adds to the wrongness.
7. It’s just a long, hard, pointy shoe, move on.
9. Nice logo, Dr. WOOD (L — semi-erect, R — fully erect).
10. Lastly, I had to include this Internet-famous Chiquita poster because I STILL can not believe it was a real ad (which it most definitely was).
BONUS: It’s an 8+ minute video of a man wearing a green bag over his head and purple socks making love to a huge Cheeto made out of hundreds of little Cheetos while chanting/singing “I love you Cheetos” over and over and over to an annoying techno track.
About half of these are via The Blog of Unnecessary Phallic Symbols, who haven’t published an update since May 30th, which perturbs me.
- Chicago police chief Garry McCarthy has resigned after backlash from the police shooting death of Laquan McDonald. ›
- It's World AIDS Day — 35 million people have died from AIDS-related conditions, and more than 34 million people are living with the disease. ›
- Cyber Monday 2015 could be the biggest online sales day in history, according to data from Adobe. Shoppers are on track to spend nearly $3 billion 💳📲