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Posted on Jan 8, 2015

There's Something AWESOME In That Clearly Kombucha You're Drinking

It's THE GREATEST. (This article is written in parody of Tanner Ringerud's recent post about kombucha.)

by ClearlyKombucha

Community Contributor

Clearly Kombucha is a popular fermented tea drink that everyone is going nuts about right now.

It tastes really great, and unlike most of the more popular brands, it doesn't have any additional sugar or added bad stuff.

In addition to being effervescent and refreshing, some claim that kombucha is really good for you and your guts! It’s like the perfect drink!

Nope! Nothing weird or horribly upsetting about kombucha!

I mean, except for that junk floating around in it. But that’s probably not a big deal, right? What even is that stuff? Does anyone know?

I DO! I KNOW WHAT IT IS, AND NOW YOU KNOW TOO AND YOU’LL BE A LITTLE BIT FREAKED OUT BUT INFORMED! IT’S A “SCOBY.” WHAT’S SCOBY, YOU ASK? THIS! THIS IS SCOBY, A SYMBIOTIC COLONY OF BACTERIA AND YEAST, YO.

And while it might look a little gross, it's a live ingredient of bacteria (think yogurt) and yeast (think beer). Fermented foods are actually pretty rad.

The SCOBY is responsible for all the live cultures in the drink, the live stuff floating and ultimately infusing in the liquid, and the dead stuff sinking... Yeah, yout heard me: Dead yeast is in the bottom of most bottles.

But why drink the dead yeast when the good stuff is infused throughout the liquid after fermentation? Good question. Our answer: We don't. (Hence the name Clearly Kombucha.)

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There's Something AWESOME In That Clearly Kombucha You're Drinking

Clearly Kombucha is a popular fermented tea drink that everyone is going nuts about right now.

It tastes really great, and unlike most of the more popular brands, it doesn't have any additional sugar or added bad stuff.

In addition to being effervescent and refreshing, some claim that kombucha is really good for you and your guts! It’s like the perfect drink!

Nope! Nothing weird or horribly upsetting about kombucha!

I mean, except for that junk floating around in it. But that’s probably not a big deal, right? What even is that stuff? Does anyone know?

I DO! I KNOW WHAT IT IS, AND NOW YOU KNOW TOO AND YOU’LL BE A LITTLE BIT FREAKED OUT BUT INFORMED! IT’S A “SCOBY.” WHAT’S SCOBY, YOU ASK? THIS! THIS IS SCOBY, A SYMBIOTIC COLONY OF BACTERIA AND YEAST, YO.

And while it might look a little gross, it's a live ingredient of bacteria (think yogurt) and yeast (think beer). Fermented foods are actually pretty rad.

The SCOBY is responsible for all the live cultures in the drink, the live stuff floating and ultimately infusing in the liquid, and the dead stuff sinking... Yeah, yout heard me: Dead yeast is in the bottom of most bottles.

But why drink the dead yeast when the good stuff is infused throughout the liquid after fermentation? Good question. Our answer: We don't. (Hence the name Clearly Kombucha.)

So everytime you're reaching for a bottle of probiotic goodness, just remember the choice is CLEARLY kombucha.

There's Something AWESOME In That Clearly Kombucha You're Drinking

Clearly Kombucha is a popular fermented tea drink that everyone is going nuts about right now.

It tastes really great, and unlike most of the more popular brands, it doesn't have any additional sugar or added bad stuff.

In addition to being effervescent and refreshing, some claim that kombucha is really good for you and your guts! It’s like the perfect drink!

Nope! Nothing weird or horribly upsetting about kombucha!

I mean, except for that junk floating around in it. But that’s probably not a big deal, right? What even is that stuff? Does anyone know?

I DO! I KNOW WHAT IT IS, AND NOW YOU KNOW TOO AND YOU’LL BE A LITTLE BIT FREAKED OUT BUT INFORMED! IT’S A “SCOBY.” WHAT’S SCOBY, YOU ASK? THIS! THIS IS SCOBY, A SYMBIOTIC COLONY OF BACTERIA AND YEAST, YO.

And while it might look a little gross, it's a live ingredient of bacteria (think yogurt) and yeast (think beer). Fermented foods are actually pretty rad.

The SCOBY is responsible for all the live cultures in the drink, the live stuff floating and ultimately infusing in the liquid, and the dead stuff sinking... Yeah, yout heard me: Dead yeast is in the bottom of most bottles.

But why drink the dead yeast when the good stuff is infused throughout the liquid after fermentation? Good question. Our answer: We don't. (Hence the name Clearly Kombucha.)

So everytime you're reaching for a bottle of probiotic goodness, just remember the choice is CLEARLY kombucha.

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