1. Can I touch your hair?
Honey, despite it’s unruly appearance these curls took hours of precious conditioning, detangling, twisting, and styling, and playing with it will create unwanted frizz. DO. NOT. TOUCH.
2. How do you get your hair so curly?
Water. Agua. Eau. Voda. Vatten. Amanzi.
3. You'll never get a professional job with your hair like that.
I literally know. I’ve thought long and hard about how my big curly hair, twists, deadlocks, etc are not welcomed in corporate America and you know what, FUCK CORPORATE AMERICA.
4. Did you even brush your hair today? It looks a mess...
Honestly, refer to number 1, and its not a mess its just different from the Eurocentric standards of beauty you’ve been conditioned to find more beautiful.
5. What are you?
Half human, half Beyoncé
6. Where are you from? No like, where are you from, from?
'Merica
7. You're so exotic!
You might mean well but, you're problematic. Look up the term "orientalism." You're welcome.
8. You're just black/white enough.
9. You get the best of both worlds!
10. That's your REAL mom/dad/sister/brother/cousin/etc?
YES. I know it is a little different to see a little black girl holding hands with her white mother, but we are in fact family. No, I'm not adopted, and no I haven't been kidnapped! Stop staring.
11. So, your mom is into black guys? Does it run in the family? LOL
Actually I like my men how I like my coffee. I don't drink coffee. LOL.
12. Your dad must have had jungle fever, huh?
Gross. Stop it.
13. How do you decide which race to date?
I like what I like.
14. I want a mixed baby one day!
Please stop fetishizing us.
15. You speak so well for a black girl!
Honestly, just stop talking. This doesn't make sense. Speaking well is not inherently a "white" trait.
16. Do you fit in more with black or white people?
Michael Jackson said it best, "it doesn't matter if you're black or white."
17. Don't you have to pick a side?
This isn't kickball, this is real life. We don't need to pick a team.
18. You act more black/white.
19. I don't see color.
Congrats on your white privilege.
20. Do you like, eat fried chicken and kool-aid at your black family gatherings?
Proudly, bitch. Fried chicken is delicious, who doesn't like it?
21. Do your white relatives even season their food?
Honestly...no comment. LOL.
22. You can't dance, you must have gotten that from your white relatives.
23. Can you rap? We wanna hear you rap!
24. You like alternative punk music? No way! I would have totally thought you’d only be into that rap stuff…
25. You're so pale. Aren't you supposed to be black?
Black comes in hundreds of beautiful shades.
26. I'm gonna come back from vacation darker than you!
Actually you'll look more like this but ok...
27. Why do you always have to bring race into it?
28. Why are you always so angry?
Do you even watch the news?
29. You're like the sassy black friend!
This stereotype is still a thing?
30. I can’t pronounce your name, I’m gonna call you *inserts irrelevant nickname here*
Read this. :)
31. What does your name mean in *inserts random language*
32. Your name sounds ghetto.
Ok Raven Symoné...
33. You have a white name. Did your parents do that on purpose?
34. Reverse racism isn't real.
Imma let you finish but...
35. You're only HALF black/white though.
36. Can I say the N word around you?
37. Is it racist if I say...
If you have to ask...yeah probably.
38. What's wrong with the term colored? The NAACP uses it...
39. Come on, it was just a joke. Lighten up!
Yeah, a RACIST joke. Do better.
40. You must be so proud that we have a bi-racial president.
It is pretty lit, but racism still exists.
41. Do I call you biracial, mixed, white, black, mullato, caramel cream machiatto with a chocolate drizzle, halfie, or what?
Bi-racial works just fine, thanks.
42. Everyones gonna look like you by 2050, mixed people are taking over the world!
The world will be over by 2050 due to man made global warming, but cool. :)
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