20 Things That Make South Carolina Awesome

What makes South Carolina so awesome?

20. The State Fair

Via scstatefair.org

The only time of year where kids skipping school isn't frowned upon - and actually encouraged - to enjoy the seasonal (to us) artery-clogging concoctions that are begging to be consumed. Gluttony and sloth FTW!

19. Salmon Pants

They're FRAT-TASTIC!

Hey, ladies!!!

18. Bar-B-Que: Mustard v. Vinegar-based

Magic. / Via shealysbbq.com

The choice is yours.

PRO TIP: Enjoy with hash and rice.

17. Firefly Sweet Tea Vodka

Firefly / Via fireflyvodka.com!/home.cfm

How does South Carolina make vodka southern?

Make it sweet tea flavored, of course!

16. Hilton Head Island

Golf, golf, beach and more golf. But... *insert inappropriate phallic joke here*

15. Humidity

It's not much different from a steamy bathroom after a hot shower. Except you're clothed. You're welcome.

14. Elgin Catfish Stomp

Stomp / Via kershawcountychamber.org

Next to noodlin', does it get any more Southern than catfish stompin'? Why am I surprised PETA hasn't harassed Elgin about this already?

FACT: There's also the Irmo Okra Strut and Rosewood Crawfish Festival.

13. The Big Mo

Because making out in an indoor theater is too mainstream.

12. St. Patrick's Day in 5 Points

Via warq.com

Everyone hates you if you go and they have to work.

...And their revenge is the rain. The storm that happens every.single.year.

11. Ernest Lee AKA "The Chicken Man"

Shake Yo Tail Feathers / Via chickenmanart.com

Obviously a huge Gamecock fan, and a really nice, down to Earth guy who's doing what he loves. He personally sells his work on Harden Street in downtown Columbia. Or here.

10. Carolina Cup

Held in Camden every year, it's a sea of floppy hats, salmon pants, bow ties and the consumption of copious amounts of alcohol. Oh, and some horse racing, too.

See the monograms? See? SEE!?

9. Charleston

Good ol' Chucktown. When the tide goes out, and you're not far enough away from marshes, the smell of plough (pronounced "pluff") mud fills the air like a giant crop dust fart. At least until you A) get used to it or B) you come to appreciate it.

It just wants to be loved!

8. Hootie & The Blowfish

You couldn't go anywhere without hearing them in the 90s or without seeing this t-shirt. If you didn't exist in the 90s, please educate yourself and thank me later.

7. Myrtle Beach

What can I say about Fertile Myrtle?

Where poor decisions are made and souls go to die for a week.

"Go on vacation, leave on probation."

6. The Shag

It's South Carolina's state dance. Props to the preservation society.

"Do you fancy a shag?"

5. Hey Y'all!

Just about any Southern girl can melt the most stone cold of hearts with a "Hey y'all!" Unless you're a true blue Yankee impervious to awesome. In which case, I can't help you.

4. Monograms Galore

The unspoken rule of monograms: If it exists, it can be monogrammed. If it can be monogrammed, it will in fact, be monogrammed.

PRO TIP: Complete your monogramming obsession with a huge decal on your back window. It's helpful if you forget where you parked your car.

3. Carolina Girls

Carolina Girls are so great, a song was written about us.

We can't be beat unless it's Sunday on the state house steps. It's law.

2. Carolina and Clemson Rivalry

Someone will be saying "Maybe next year" until the next game.

Fear the thumb, Clemson... Fear the thumb.

1. The State Flag

Like monograms -if it exists- it will have a palmetto tree and crescent.

FACT: The "moon" is not a moon. It's a gorget.