1. Post on yahoo answers.
2. ????
3. PROFIT!

OLD Buzzfeed - you already did this one.

Let me know how that works out for ya.

Captainf should get an honorable mention in the Darwin Awards for his noble online work.

I think you have to give your voice to a witch/squidlady. That should work.

I BECAME A MERMAID! LOL

I've had mermaid. They catch those out in Nantucket once and while. A bit stringy.

BTW: I am also a witch.