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12 Times Carrie Bradshaw Forgot How To Eat Food

Why can’t she just eat without looking ridiculous? I’ve included the worst possible screen shots because it’s better this way.

1. When she shoveled this huge bite of spaghetti into her mouth and then spit it out to talk to Skipper (remember Skipper?)

Even Miranda, who looks weird ALL the time, could eat spaghetti normally in this episode.

2. When the jazz musician tried to feed her this mi krop, which is still just noodles.

Dogs have taken treats more gracefully.

3. When this spring roll got the better of her and Aidan had to wipe her mouth.

Sigh

4. When she stuffed this huge cube of cheese into her mouth and talked to Big with her mouth full (as always.)

Just finish chewing first. GOD.

5. When she didn’t even get the chance to look stupid eating her birthday cake because she dropped it on wet cement.

You can bet that if she did get the chance to eat it, she’d still be sloppy as hell. Probably slurp it or something.

6. When she attempted to eat this cupcake with Miranda.

IT’S JUST A CUPCAKE.

7. When Aidan tried to feed her this piece of cake.

Another wasted feeding attempt.

8. When she couldn’t eat this hot dog without looking like a savage beast.

That poor limo driver just wanted to give her a treat and this is how she repaid her.

9. When she couldn’t even eat French fries without getting ketchup all over her.

And then she tried to flirt with Berger with that ketchup smile.

10. When she couldn’t even make eating pancakes look normal at Aleksandr Petrovsky’s.

How?????

11. When she tried to eat pastries and smoke a cigarette at the same time in Paris.

Who in the hell does that? WHO?

12. When this baguette defeated her in Paris during the same damn montage.

Just give up.

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