Buzz·Posted on 26 Nov 201524 Tweets About Sleep Guaranteed To Make You LaughYawn, snore, drool, repeat.by Ben HenryBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @LaziestCanine [teenage girl reading horoscope tweets] "Gemini's go to sleep when they are tired" HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO ME 02:44 AM - 23 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. jake @jakeefischer me: I can't sleep WebMD: lol u pregnant 09:56 PM - 18 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Carrie @TheCareBare she's all "don't sleep in the nude- what if there's a fire and the fire men come and see you naked" uh you pretty much described my fantasy 10:48 PM - 08 Aug 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. Khalifa @KKAlThani Every morning when the alarm goes off, I wake up & say "it's time to chase my dreams!" & then I press the snooze button & go back to sleep. 09:52 AM - 22 May 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Todd 'Papi' Carlos @TheToddWilliams Prince Charming: I will awaken her with love's sweet ki-- Sleeping Beauty: five more minutes 02:18 AM - 27 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. bananafanafofisa @lisaxy424 "SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP" I yell at the neighbor I can hear vacuuming at 1pm in the afternoon. 05:58 PM - 20 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. pakalu papito @pakalupapito i have two moods: ・sleep is for the weak ・sleeping for a week 10:32 AM - 26 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Wicked Jen @wickedsuga Did Adam and Eve have bellybuttons? *reason #42 why I can't fall asleep 03:31 AM - 14 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. no @tbhjuststop I used to be able to pull all nighters but now I can barely even pull all dayers haha I love sleeping 12:47 AM - 25 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. heather lou* @heatherlou_ *slips seductively out of shorts* You know what that means... *sleeps soundly for 7 hours* *drools a little* 03:01 AM - 29 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. Bob Kostic @causticbob Do you ever wake up, kiss the person sleeping beside you and feel glad to be alive? I just did and I won't be allowed on this airline again 12:32 PM - 29 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. 3M075 @SamuelHLowe *wakes up from a 10 year coma, pretends to be asleep for an extra 5 minutes* 08:23 AM - 24 Jan 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. Reverend Scott @Reverend_Scott Goodnight honey. "Daddy, where do babies come from?" The stork flies them in. "Why's it take 9 months?" Wind resistance. Go to sleep. 09:37 PM - 07 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. Tortured_soul @1Tortured_soul Fun fact: The average Canadian swallows eight moose per year in their sleep. 01:03 AM - 11 Jan 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Swishergirl @Swishergirl24 Romeo and Juliet is my favorite story about idiot teenagers who don't know the difference between sleeping and dead 06:25 PM - 07 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Kyle Lippert @Kyle_Lippert "Hey. You sleeping? No? Whatcha thinkin about? Hey. Did you hear me? Hey. Hey. Ok. You're boring. I'm leaving... Jk I'm back. Hey" - Birds 12:08 PM - 21 Jan 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Nathan Usher @thenatewolf *waits until a bird falls asleep, quietly creeps beside it's nest* HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO HELLO ARE YOU AWAKE!?!! HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS!?! 05:18 PM - 25 May 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. Miss Fuckalicious @PyrBliss The trick to falling asleep is putting your phone down. Unfortunately, that's not a risk I'm willing to take. 07:43 AM - 05 Jun 2012 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. David Hughes @david8hughes [baby wakes up in the middle night] "Go back to sleep, hun. I'll sort it out." [puts baby on eBay] 04:27 PM - 16 Jul 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. BILL_NYE_THO @Bill_Nye_Tho__ elephants sleep standing up you could be chillin with an elephant and at any moment they could just be like "lmao for sure, g'night" 04:33 AM - 18 Oct 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. ♡online wisdom guy♡ @SortaBad How to sleep: 1. Lay down 2. Dim lights 3. Dwell about literally every mistake you've made in your life for 6 hours 4. Rest for 9 minutes 04:05 AM - 03 Oct 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. Stupid Girl @doooiiiit How long do I have to sleep before I'm legally a bear? 02:13 PM - 14 Mar 2012 Reply Retweet Favorite 23. Flex Steelrod @Flexsteelrod The GF goes away for 10 days, *shits going to get wild * sleeps in middle of bed 07:12 PM - 24 Mar 2013 Reply Retweet Favorite 24. Heather Daniels @hdaniels_00 When people tell me "You're going to regret that in the morning", I sleep til noon because I am a problem solver 03:45 AM - 19 Aug 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite