Which Of Taylor Swift’s Jilted Lovers Are You?

If Taylor Swift has not already dated you, given her track record, she’s probably dated someone who is a lot like you.

1. 1. Which of the following would an ex use to describe you?

   Via: Jason Merritt / Getty Images
   1. Cool and self-deprecating.
   2. Outgoing and funny.
   3. Pensive and mature.
   4. Uncomplicated and easygoing.
   5. Confused and difficult.
   6. Dopey and cheerful.

2. 2. What do you like to do in your free time?

   Via: Christopher Polk / Getty Images
   1. Practice your choreography and get your hair looking exactly right.
   2. Update your Twitter.
   3. Struggle with your sexual identity and fight inner demons.
   4. Color with crayons.
   5. Star in short films and music videos for independent bands from Brooklyn.
   6. Pretend to be 13 years younger than you actually are.

3. 3. Where would you most like to live?

   Via: Isaac Brekken for Clear Channel / Getty Images
   1. A quaint little village by the sea.
   2. Apartments in L.A. and NYC.
   3. Greenpoint, Brooklyn.
   4. In a moon-base or, like, a really cool castle with a moat.
   5. With your siblings.
   6. The beautiful, snowcapped mountains of British Columbia, Canada.

4. 4. What achievement have you always dreamed of?

   Via: Kevin Winter / Getty Images
   1. Winning an even 10 Grammy awards.
   2. Getting out from under your brothers’ shadows.
   3. Being strong enough to take on Hulk Hogan.
   4. Being earnestly referred to as an artist.
   5. Retiring in the next five years.
   6. Winning an even 10 Teen Choice Awards.

5. 5. What do you find most appealing about Taylor Swift?

   Via: Michael Kovac / Getty Images
   1. Her virginal, uncorrupted nature.
   2. She looks good next to you at parties.
   3. She REAL purdy.
   4. Love is complex, and sometimes someone who seems vapid can actually be really deep.
   5. I’m in it for the green card.
   6. My agent told me that the PR people said it’d be good for magazine sales.

6. 6. What do you think about when you're looking at a beautiful sunset?

   Via: Jason Merritt / Getty Images
   1. “I should write a smooth, acoustic song about how much this sunset reminds me of a girl I dated once.”
   2. Look on in jealousy that something could be so beautiful and natural.
   3. “I wish I were playing Nintendo.”
   4. “Pssht. Seen it.”
   5. “I can’t believe there have been almost 11,000 of these in my lifetime.”
   6. “Man, I hope that paparazzi is around. I bet I look really introspective right now.”

7. 7. What are you like at parties?

   Via: Alexandra Wyman for smartwater / Getty Images
   1. I hit on everything that moves.
   2. I’m quiet, usually wishing I were somewhere else.
   3. I’m SO good at beer pong. Take me on, bro. I’ll kick your ass.
   4. I find the oldest person in the room and just sit and, like, learn from them.
   5. The kids today with their dubstep. THE MUSIC IS ALWAYS SO LOUD. Why are there so many swears?
   6. Rich. I get paid $150,000 for each appearance.

8. 8. Where do you like to go for a first date?

   Via: Carlos Alvarez / Getty Images
   1. I’ve got two tickets to Pound-Town!
   2. Church.
   3. The Libarry. (Too seem smart.)
   4. Is it a first Thursday? I’d take them to a subdued art opening.
   5. I heard Salman Rushdie is reading from his memoirs.
   6. Two tickets to Paris. Alert the paparazzi.

9. 9. What's your favorite food?

   Via: Jason Merritt / Getty Images
   1. Don’t care, as long as I can eat it off of you.
   2. Communion wafers.
   3. Chicken McNuggets.
   4. Vegan soy protein with leaf paste.
   5. Poutine.
   6. A goose fois gras emulsified foam.

10. 10. Where's the craziest place you've ever made whoopie (fornicated)?

    Via: Christopher Polk for NARAS / Getty Images
    1. A dumpster.
    2. I haven’t. Waiting until I’m married.
    3. In Stinky Dave’s basement.
    4. In a yurt.
    5. In Canada.
    6. Aboard my private jet. In front of the queen.

Which Of Taylor Swift’s Jilted Lovers Are You?

1. Via: Dimitrios Kambouris for VEVO / Getty Images

   You got: You are John Mayer!

   Congratulations? You’re a total douchebag.

2. Via: Jeff Kravit / Getty Images

   You got: You are Joe Jonas!

   You’ve got a lot to figure out about yourself. Maybe you should spend less time worrying about what people around you think about you, and more time thinking about what makes YOU happy.

3. Via: Jean Baptiste Lacroix/WireImage

   You got: You are Taylor Lautner!

   U dated nice girl once. She very pretty and smart. U miss pretty girl. Her hair soft like bunny. One time you pet bunny too hard and it stopped moving. U got in trouble after that. U still think about girl lots.

4. Via: Swarbrick/INFphoto.com

   You got: You are Jake Gyllenhaal!

   You worry about your rep a lot, but it’s actually cool to date someone so mainstream, if you think about it. Like, everyone else is dating a graphic designer or a bass player from a shoegaze band, but dating a MAJOR POP STAR?! So edgy.

5. Via: Larry Busacca for NARAS / Getty Images

   You got: You are Cory Monteith!

   You’re SUPER old. It’s actually kinda gross that you dated Taylor Swift at all. Honestly, you’re almost old enough to be her dad. Why don’t you stick with women your own age, like Betty White. (Get it? Cause you’re both old.)

6. Via: FameFlynetUK/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES

   You got: You are Harry Styles!

   You are a golden god. A modern day adonis. You could have any woman in the world. Why Taylor Swift? Who can say? Maybe because it was in vogue. Maybe because you wanted to sample every woman possible. Maybe it’s just because you wanted to see yourself on the cover of People Magazine more. Your motivations are a total mystery, even to yourself.

SHARE YOUR RESULTS!