18 Heartbreaking Excerpts From The Diary Of A Cat Left Outdoors

    It is often said that no adversity can equal the horror of being a cat left outside for five minutes or so.

    Day 1: It's getting to be dusk and the expedition has been in the out of doors for several hours. I hold out hope that we'll be back inside before nightfall.

    Day 2: The night was fairly mild, and morale remains high. No sign of movement from indoors.

    Day 3: The weather has taken a turn for the worse. This unexpected horror only adds to the considerable discomfort of our situation.

    Day 4: Inclement conditions persist. The expedition is shaken, but we persevere.

    Day 5: While scouting, we caught a glimpse of a member of the population native to the indoors. We will attempt further communication in the morning.

    Day 6: We've made first contact with the native indoor population. They seem curious as to how we've arrived at our current predicament.

    Day 7: Close encounter with the indoor population. We hope that this development expedites our return to the indoors.

    Day 8: With the help of the indoor population, we've discovered a small fissure that leads indoors. Sadly, the opening is too small to pass through. We'll keep trying though.

    Day 9: It would appear as though we've been abandoned once again. No sign of the indoor population. We've a long, cold night ahead of us.

    Day 10: The men grow desperate to reestablish contact with the indoor world. Despite our ambitions at the outset, every cat in the expedition is now weary of the outdoors.

    Day 11: No help coming from indoors. We've decided to take matters into our own hands. We're looking for reentry in places we've never explored before now.

    Day 12: We're making foolish mistakes. We are desperate. It's becoming clear that we may never see indoors again.

    Day 13: Outlook remains grim. Tempers are running short. I fear violence may be imminent.

    Day 14: We were forced to cut meat rations again. The men remain restless and angry.

    Day 15: Just when it seems things could not get worse, we've encountered a predator we've never seen before.

    Day 16: The threat from earlier has been dealt with. On a related note, we've resumed full meat rations.

    Day 17: Oh glorious day! A scouting party found a pass high above a window in the living room. It seems as though we have found our salvation.

    Day 18: The expedition is safely indoors once again, basking in the comfort of electronic heat. We've made up our mind to never explore outdoors again, unless the human leaves the door open again.