31 Reasons Ross Lynch Should Go To Prom With Me

It would be rossome of you.

1. Because we could go to a nice dinner first

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Make sure you make reservations first because the Cape Coral Carrabba's gets packed on prom night.

2. Because I'd give us awesome outfits

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I'm thinking I'll wear a dark blue dress. Chiffon. Real classy. And you can wear a black vest and dark blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up. I don't know, but please no camo. Nobody would be able to see us.

3. Because she already took the "Write a celebrity a song to make them do something with you" route

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And it worked!

4. Because it isn't that far away

It's only a 37 hour drive. Or an 841 hour walk. But it would just make more sense to take a plane. Whatever you prefer.

5. Because we have so much in common

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You sing and dance and I sing and dance. You'll be able to catch me as the Wicked Witch in the North Fort Myers High School production of Shrek. I have a fake nose and fake fingernails. I guess you could say I'm a pretty big deal.

6. Because milkshakes after prom

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'nuff said.

7. Because it would be a great promo for you

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Teen heartthrob comes to town to reign his beautiful presence on unsuspecting fan. IT'S JUST LIKE BYE BYE BIRDIE. Except you're not about to go off to war (at least I think), I don't have a boyfriend named Hugo (at least I think), I don't live in Ohio (I'm pretty sure), and I regret to inform you that I do not, in fact, have a pin with your face on it (which I could fix).

8. Because it wouldn't be that big of a commitment

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It's just one night. Then you can go back to your perfect, star-studded life.

9. Because you deserve a day off

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I'm sure there's been a time when you just wish you could go incognito. I guarantee, there will be no mobs of people fangirling around you because North Fort Myers High School people are fans of one of three things: showtunes, off road mudding, or math.

10. Because I'm blowing off my math homework to make this list

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Ross Lynch > College Algebra

There. I have the only equation I need.

11. Because we'd clearly be on Prom Court

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I'm actually just kidding about this one. I am definitely not popular enough to get on prom court.

12. Because I do not have a criminal record

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You wouldn't have to worry that I'm a creepy stalker or am secretly an ex trying to plot her revenge. The only thing they've got on me is a library book I haven't returned since 2008. The Lee County Library System didn't need that, right?

13. Because my last two school dance dates were gay

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It was fun, but when your date leaves the dance to make out with his boyfriend, you're just sad.

14. Because It's a great theme

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I can't disclose any information until the theme is revealed in late February.

15. Because I bet you've never been to a prom before

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DOESN'T IT LOOK LIKE FUN!?!

16. Because I'm a great dancer

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THIS COULD BE US

17. Because pre-prom pictures are fun to take

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This is the best part. And they will rock.

18. Because I will try my best to make you a boutineer out of pizza

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Oh look, a flower. WHOOPDY FREAKIN' DO. WANNA KNOW WHAT'S BETTER THAN A FLOWER?! A FLOWER MADE OUT OF PIZZA.

19. Because my parents and friends don't think I'll get a date.

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DO YOU WANT THAT TO BE ME?!?

20. Because contrary to popular belief, there are young people in Florida

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Young people, like me. Who need a date to prom *hint hint nudge nudge*

21. I like mismatched socks with polka dots

You don't think I'd make this list without throwing in a reference to one of your songs, did you? I don't like my pizza cold, though. I'm sorry.

22. Because I too, am a teen sensation

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I'm just kidding about this, too. The only thing I am is a pathological liar.

23. Because there's always a gift with purchase of a prom ticket

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Last year it was a cup holder, the year before, a genie lamp picture holder (pictured above). I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT THEY HAVE IN STORE FOR US THIS YEAR.

24. Because we'd get along great

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I like puns, music, Star Wars, and Frank Sinatra. What more could you want in a prom date?

25. Because I am not the type of person who likes to be over the top

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People who do prom limo and big entrances are too much. They are people I cannot deal with. They are people I do not want to be with. They are people who are wrong.

26. Because I will have emergency bandaids in my wallet

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Here's the deal. You might think this isn't important, but when those beautiful dancing feet of yours hurt from the inevitable merciless hardwood floor, I will have you covered. I will make sure nothing goes wrong. Except for a bear attack. I cannot prevent a bear attack.

27. Because my five year old sister knows how much I love your face and she is convinced she can steal you from me.

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It doesn't matter what her dress looks like. Mine will look better and you'll want to pick me.

28. Because I trusted the internet to aid me in your courtship

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The internet does not fail.

29. Because it'll be a great story I tell my kids

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It'll be one of those "pick your head up, it could happen to you" stories. Better than anything my parents ever told me:

Dad: Do you have a date this time?

Me: No. I'm going with friends

Dad: Honey, it's okay. There's no shame in you going alone. All by yourself. Without anyone.

Me: Thanks

30. Because I'm giving you enough time in advance

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Airfare only goes up the longer you wait. Better book that plane ticket now.

31. Because it'll be fun

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Please?