1. Sega was a pioneer in the gaming industry - years ahead of its time.
Released in 1989, Genesis was leaps & bounds ahead of the Atari and whipped Nintendo with spectrum of games and appeal to all crowds.
2. It captivated users with completely ridiculous & disgusting game premises: Boogerman, ToeJam & Earl, Earthworm Jim…
Who wouldn’t want to burp and fart on toilet trolls to kill them? And collecting plungers instead of coins or rings was a lovely touch. Not to mention ample snot, trash, fecal matter and, of course, boogers.
An earthworm destined to fight evil and save Princess Whats-Her-Name. No seriously, her name is Princess Whats-Her-Name.
Alien rappers with revolting names? Does a better story exist? I think not.
3. You became all of your favorite Disney stars of your childhood.
Irrefutably the best looking “street rat” of all time.
Lion King was terrifying to play! Hakuna Matata, my ass.
Timon saying “It starts…” at the beginning still echoes in my dreams.
Sega’s biggest hit before Sonic, Mickey Mouse’s Castle of Illusion was such a big hit that it was re-released for contemporary consoles just last month.
Fantasia, Goofy, A Bug’s Life, Pocahontas, Mulan, Pinocchio, The Jungle Books - Disney pumped out more games than it did movies.
4. Movies-Turned-Games weren’t only for Disney. Practically every movie in the late 80s to mid 90’s was immortalized, Sega-style.
Disclaimer: Sylvester Stallone not included.
If Genesis games were still coming out today, they’d probably have one featuring Schwarzenegger’s governor run.
Today’s highschoolers weren’t even born when the orginal Toy Story came out. You’re old.
Don’t lie. Jurassic Park was so scary it made you want to play Animaniacs just to comfort yourself.
TOO. MUCH. ANXIETY. AHHH!!!
Mario on Nintendo was for sissies. You were tough enough.
5. But it wasn’t all about the boys games. Unlike most gaming systems, Sega had girl appeal too.
And most importantly, aquired valuable driving practice! Young female millennials learned to drive with Barbie in the trademark pink convertible – weaving in and out of traffic, avoiding on-coming traffic, swerving away from pedestrians. Talk about real world preparation!
6. Old School Graphics = Ingenius Minimalist Art
For a 16 bit system & a pallet of only 512 colors, the graphics were pretty money.
7. Perfect Controller: Comfortable, functional & just the right amount of buttons
This controller pwned Nintendo’s palm-jabbing hard corners. And the circular D-pad was not only functional but made diagonal moves possible. Kudos, Sega. Kudos.
8. The Birth of Real Time Strategy Games
The first tactical rather than purely strategic RTS.
Indistinguishable logos, players without names, a playbook the size of your preschool notebook – a beautiful beginning.
The beginning of the highest selling game franchise in history. Boom.
Also, starting in 2001, the beginning of the Madden Curse.
“Covered you like a rug!”
“And the survey says…. DENIED!”
“Friends don’t let friends drive and dunk!”
“Is it the shoes?!”
“He’s building himself a house… one brick at a time!”
“Just like your mother’s top drawer - nothin’ but nylon!”
Best. Announcers. Ever.
World Series Baseball: America’s pastime on your childhood pastime. ‘Merica.
American Gladiators: For when you just couldn’t wait for it to come on old tube TV (complete with foil & clothes hanger for better reception).
11. There were even games for Canadians, too!
Check oot that EA logo, eh?
12. The Antithesis of Grand Theft Auto: STREETS OF RAGE
Back when it was still cool to be the good guy.
13. The King of Pop Lives On
Some critics place this in Sega’s all time Top Ten games. MJ moonwalked his way to the stars!
You know its old because MJ is still black. And presumably still has a nose.
BONUS: How could you tell when it was bedtime at the Neverland Ranch?
When the big hand touched the little hand! (Think about it…)
14. These games literally morphed our pop culture today. The creators The Walking Dead spent their childhood playing this post-apocalyptic football fusion.
15. The ORIGINAL Candy Crush
Candy Crush made millions by taking Columns and putting it on Facebook. Surrender to Sega, suckers!
You’ll never forget that raspy voice uttering those magical words: “flawless victory”.
17. There’s thousands of titles and you can buy them for PENNIES… literally!
18. One Word: SONIC.
That’s right Sonic - you know you’re #1!
Our beloved little hedgehog is now 22, and still going strong!
Alone or with sidekicks, he’s still racing around and collecting rings, taking names and kicking ass!
Miss your Sega? They’re back! For $40 you can relive your childhood. You’re welcome.
I bought mine off of Groupon. $40 bought memories, nostalgia and childhood.
Best video game console EVER.