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    Why Alicia Keys Is The Worst Waitress Of All Time

    In "You Don't Know My Name", what AK intended to be a lyrical ditty about an innocent work crush turned into a blatant violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

    1. She got his contact information out of the free lunch bowl at the restaurant.

    2. Therefore calling him on his work land line or cell phone.

    3. And also means she technically took company property.

    4. She admits to going against company protocol to make his hot chocolate.

    5. She memorizes his outfits.

    6. She daydreams during billable hours.

    But this was all just a dream and she never had the courage to speak to him. Guess she's a better waitress than we imagined.