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30 Reasons Why We Will Always Be Crazy For Patrick Swayze

The great Swayze would have celebrated his 62nd birthday this week.

1. Swayze was as versatile an actor as he was a dancer.

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By playing both the tough guy and the romantic hero, Swayze reminded us that, like a roll of Quilted Northern toilet paper, a guy could be soft AND strong.

2. One minute he could be totally seductive…

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3. …and the next minute he might be punching your lights out. But only if you were a bad guy and totally deserved it anyway.

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“Be nice, until it’s time to not be nice.”

4. Seriously, the guy could handle some serious pain.

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After all, “Pain don’t hurt.”

5. He was never willing to put up with any crap.

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Whether that included stealing from the register, burning down any local business that refused to go along with your racketeering scheme, or breaking beer bottles over each other’s heads at the Double Deuce.

6. Maybe because he was such a Zen master?

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All that early morning rooftop tai chi.

7. And an incredible surfer, always looking for the next big wave.

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“If you want the ultimate, you’ve got to be willing to pay the ultimate price. It’s not tragic to die doing what you love.”

8. He was always hobnobbing with other great celebrities…

Like Mariah!

9. …and his hair was always perfectly coiffed.

My oh mullet.

10. He was world-renowned for his sexiness.

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Some would say it was the mullet that helped make him People’s Sexiest Man Alive for 1991.

11. Honestly, sometimes his beauty was pretty hard to handle.

12. I mean, those LEGS!

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13. But even though he was loved by many, his heart beat only for you.

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14. He was so cute he could make you do some crazy things just to be near him.

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Like carry a watermelon.

15. And his beauty would unnerve you so much that you would find yourself saying embarrassing things in his presence.

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Like, “I carried a watermelon.”

16. But then he would show you his dirty dance moves, and you’d be hooked.

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17. He inspired you to bust out your own best dance moves.

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18. Probably because he was so good himself.

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19. I mean, really good.

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So very good.

20. But dancing wasn’t the only thing he was really good at. He was also quite good at lifting things.

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Like you.

21. And swimming. He was very good at swimming.

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And lifting things while swimming.

22. He was also quite skilled when it came to arts and crafts.

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Sometimes.

23. And he was very good at impersonations, especially when it came to presidents.

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24. His career even spawned this beautiful tribute.

Starring Channing Tatum and Charlyne Yi. One month Swayze’s eating Jujubes to keep alive, the next he’s got ladies stuffing diamonds in his pockets.

25. And this one.

Starring Reno 911 and Human Giant.

26. But the one thing he excelled at most, undoubtedly, was romancing you to the sweet melodies of Otis Redding.

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These. Arms. Of. Miiiiiine.

27. Yes, this happened on numerous occasions.

Sometimes, Otis Redding is all you need to get the job (of romance) done.

28. But he always respected your need for boundaries and space.

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“Look, spaghetti arms. This is my dance space. This is your dance space. I don’t go into yours, you don’t go into mine. You gotta hold the frame.”

29. He’d even let his sexy silver-fox friend dance with you in a diner.

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And be totally cool about it, too.

30. But the one thing he would never, ever, ever do is let anybody put you in a corner.

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NEVER!

Happy birthday Mr. Swayze, wherever you are!

Flickr: 26717559@N00 / Creative Commons

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