17. Gilligan’s Island
I would always overhear adults talking about Ginger and Mary Ann, but all I knew was that this show was super boring and a refuge of last resort.
16. Mr. Ed
This show is seriously effed up.
15. Get Smart
I think I spent 99% of this show not understanding it. Satire is tough for 8-year-olds.
14. Car 54, Where Are You?
Car 54 was the first time television taught me that cops are doofuses.
13. The Dick Van Dyke Show
This show is secretly kind of feminist.
12. The Donna Reed Show
Years later, I watched From Here To Eternity, in which Donna Reed plays a prostitute, and felt REALLY WEIRD.
11. The Addams Family
The cool thing at recess was to sing the theme song over and over again, especially if you knew how to snap your fingers.
When someone told me that Mathnet from Square One was a play on Dragnet, it was like suddenly everything in the world MADE SENSE.
There was always something really morose about the theme song to this show — and the way the slightly alien-looking kid yelled, “Lasssssssieeeeee!”
8. Dennis the Menace
The weirdest part of watching this show was realizing that the kid who played Dennis was probably now older than your parents.
7. Green Acres
Nobody forgets their first exposure to a Gabor sister.
6. I Dream of Jeannie
They blurred out Jeannie’s belly button and I was always SO. CONFUSED.
I was so confused when they switched Darrins.
4. The Mary Tyler Moore Show
Mary Tyler Moore was the second prettiest person in the whole world (after my mom).
3. My Three Sons
Fred McMurray! He looked like my granddad, and he had such great cardigans.
The youngest son was the cutest.
2. I Love Lucy
Even at age 6, I knew that Vitameatavegamin was gold.
1. The Patty Duke Show
I loved that Patty’s hair flipped out…and Cathy’s flipped under. So clever! Sometimes I still sing this theme song to myself.