1. You set an alarm for 6:30am in an attempt to exercise because your evening self is optimistic. Your morning self is not impressed.
2. You then proceed to snooze until 8:15am when it’s already too late for everything you planned on doing.
3. You drag yourself out of bed, cursing your miserable existence.
4. Then you have a full-fledged existential crisis before you’ve even put pants on.
5. You frantically start trying to get ready for work but you have so much to do you are completely overwhelmed and you just stand there staring at your wardrobe wasting even more time.
6. You try to overcompensate by drinking ludicrous amounts of coffee hoping it will help you instantly get your life together.
7. Your hair decides that it’s not going to cooperate today and you start trying to talk it into submission.
8. You now have no choice but to run to make it to work on time or risk the “you’re late again” talk from your boss which would completely crumble your already fragile psyche.
9. You get to work just on time but now you look like a deranged vagrant from all the sweat and running.
10. Your colleagues try talking to you and you just want to punch them in the face because morning people are the worst.
11. You might even say a few rash things that you’ll later regret.
12. When your coworkers ask you what your problem is you respond like this:
13. Getting asked to do any extracurricular activities before work, like a team breakfast, unanimously get this response:
14. You consider turning to alcohol every morning because in your weakened mental state it seems like a completely viable option to get you through this hellish ordeal.
How much alcohol is socially acceptable to put in an Irish Coffee?
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