40 Reasons Scotland Is Better Than England

Sorry, Sassenachs. This is just fact.

1. Irn Bru everywhere. On draught. In McDonald’s. In the corner shop. Bru!

2. You can keep Blackpool Pier, we’ve got the actual Northern Lights.

4. Scotland has proper snow, every winter.

5. Yeah, we get real weather.

6. You have the option of chippy sauce on your fish supper.

7. And being able to follow it up with one of these.

8. We created a sausage that fits into a sandwich perfectly.

9. Soor Plooms sort the men from the boys.

10. An Aberdeen rowie is proof that Scotland is God’s own land.

11. The Edinburgh Military Tattoo makes Beefeaters look lazy.

12. We’ve got the best sporting spirit in the world.

13. And we know exactly how to keep a feud going. No rivalry runs deeper than that of the Old Firm.

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14. Hogmanay. The biggest New Year’s celebration in the world. So big that Scotland has two bank holidays following it, not just one.

15. We get the best comedians.

17. Just going to leave this one here.

18. Shakespeare’s best play? Oh alright then.

19. Of course, we don’t need Will when we have Rabbie.

20. We invented the television.

22. Penicillin? That’s us.

23. Just the birthplace of Harry Potter. No big deal.

24. Sherlock’s ours too.

25. Method Man knows what’s up.

26. Jersey cattle? We prefer Highland, thanks.

27. No need to thank us for West Highland Terriers. You’re welcome.

28. Olympics? Nailed it.

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29. Oh go on then.

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30. You can keep your sarcasm, England.

31. Our newspaper headlines are legendary.

32. Let’s talk Mary, Queen of Scots. Total badass.

33. Whisky. No ‘e’.

34. A dog so loyal that he’s had two films made about him.

35. We’re not frightened by offal.

36. Our zoo has a daily penguin parade.

37. And look at our Disney princess.

38. Scotland’s alright looking, we guess.

39. Our scenery is simply extraordinary.

40. But most of all, we know when it’s time to go home, home.

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