EPCOT: What To Expect When Drinking Around The World

As told by Stacey from Disney World's Top 7 Must Sees

Warnings:

You walk 1.2 miles

You will have 11 drinks

You are going to drop $100+

You must keep it all down

Do not try every country during the Food and Wine festival. Or in the heat of Florida Summer (aka April-October) You will die.

World Showcase: Go Left

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Start promptly at noon when World Showcase opens. Go left. Seriously. You'll understand why later.

OMG! You're going to do this! It's gonna be awesome. You're at Disney. And you're gonna get drunk!

1. Mexico

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You could easily grab a boring Corona – but there’s also a hidden tequila cave in the pyramid. You start strong with a margarita – and grab a chip and queso food base, too.

Why not! This is gonna be an adventure.

2. Norway

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Seriously. What is this place and what the hell is that troll ride? Get your wine/beer and get out - you've got better places to be!

3. China

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Grab a drink and sit on the bench – we’re not trying to go too crazy here. Who cares that it has rum and vodka in it. They’re probably booze cheapskates at Disney, right?

Stand up. Oh, you're definitely tipsy. Promise yourself, only wine or beer from now on. This is strategy here, mates!

4. Germany

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Ah! Beir! Finally, something normal and recognizable! One, please.

Your body is also demanding carbs. Opt for a pretzel here or....

5. Italy

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...find the pizza place in the back of Italy!

What makes Italy awesome: free bread. And someone to bring you water. All while you lounge in the shade, carb-ing it up with a refreshing peach bellini.

Look at you, preparing yourself for success! You’re unstoppable!

6. America

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Damn.

You’re halfway through and on the opposite end of the World Showcase. Though, seriously, America, what is up with options? Shouldn't the government regulate less shitty options? Sam Adams, Sutter Home or Red Stag?!?

Pick your poision to relive your college days (sadly, no Fransia bag or PBR, but close). That happy feeling from Italy is gone, crushed by the American Dream.

7. Japan

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It's all about survival now. What seems the least painful?

Toy around with ordering sake and figure that would end up poorly. So, how about plum wine? It smells like a nursing home mixed with urinal cakes. Force it down. Move on. Don’t think about it. You're drunk. Or borderline denial drunk.

8. Morocco

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You manage to get into Morocco, but take a few minutes to walk around and psych yourself up. You can do it! Get the pre-bottled sangria, sip as fast as possible and head to the water fountain to wash it down with disgustingly sulfurous Florida water.

9. France

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You look longingly at the Grey Goose smoothie, whishing for something with a pleasant taste – but deep down you know you’re too far into the game to risk liquor. Get a rosé. At this point, it’s pretty much the equivalent of Gatorade. It recharges you with new life! Grab a croissant or some other celebratory pastry - life is good again. And you're drunk!

The end is near, you can see Canada! Aren’t you glad you’re not looking at a tequila temple now?

10. United Kingdom

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Cue laughter or whatever your drunk state is – even the best have reached their point. You’re not going to really taste what you order, so just get something you'd normally enjoy. Walk around and proclaim how life is wonderful and magical. Ask Alice about going down rabbit holes and giggle.

11. Canada

Oh, Canada! Just get the Torontopolitan. Yes, this breaks the rules of liquor, but this is a celebration!. It tastes like cranberry juice at this point and you throw it back.

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You did it! One of the most magical days imaginable, right?

Now, go sleep it off. Your vacation has only just begun.