1. You can NEVER feel safe going to sleep without checking under the bed first.
2. You’ve got to watch out for anything and everything that might be lying around the house, because it will be used as a weapon against you.
3. You should NOT let your older siblings use you to play dress up. It will come back to haunt you.
5. Personal space can be a very difficult thing to define, and your older sibling will try to take as much of yours as they can.
6. Video games are a sacred space for sibling bonding, even if you did always get stuck being player two.
7. There were some places you weren’t allowed to go, but whatever, your older sibling’s room wasn’t even that cool.
8. It’s not always a bad thing to play up being the “baby” of the family.
9. Fights can get pretty rough when you’re lacking in size and strength, so you have to be prepared.
10. Your stuff will get lost or stolen at some point, and there’s not much you can do about it.
11. You’ve learned tricks to get away with stuff that they could never do, because at this point, your parents are kind of burnt out.
12. And sometimes, to get them back for all the fights and jokes, you’ve got to blame them for those things that you did.
Sorry, bro :/
13. Hand-me-downs suck, but you can learn to wear them with pride.
14. There are some shortcuts that you’ll learn to take advantage of by watching your older sibling struggle through something first.
Learning to write? Yeah, I can do that, no problem.
15. Just because you were young doesn’t mean they won’t laugh for years and years about funny spelling mistakes you made.
It’s supposed to read “I went swimming.”
16. There is nothing quite as frightening as the thought of the pure power your eldest sibling had the first time they babysit you alone.
17. In order to maintain your innocence as the “baby” of the family, your older sibling will make sure you only have a PG knowledge of things like drugs and alcohol.
A candy “blunt” in the making.
18. And when they do finally admit that you’re growing up, they’ll be sure to tease you about it.
19. You shouldn’t believe everything your older sibling tells you; it’s basically a rite of passage for older siblings to try to trick their younger siblings.
20. They’ll try to assert their dominance over you in every form and every medium possible.
21. Even if only begrudgingly, your sibling will share things with you when you really need them to.
22. You need to check EVERYTHING they send you before showing it to other people because, in their eyes, everything is an opportunity to embarrass you.
23. Since they’re going to make you do stuff for them all the time anyway, you might as well try to make the best of it.
Like this younger brother who learned to charge money for his services.
24. No matter what your accomplishments are, your sibling will devise a way to take you down a notch or two.
25. And if your older sibling can’t appreciate your talents, sometimes you’ve just got to speak the harsh truth.
26. At some point, they will have considered you the worst thing that could ever happen to them.
The paper reads: “Worst life events: 1. My sister was born.”