1. Seeing someone you know in public and trying to avoid making eye contact so you don’t need to talk to them.
Especially awful when you’re walking toward each other on the sidewalk.
2. Getting into an elevator with someone you kind of know, but don’t know well enough to feel comfortable talking to.
3. When the phone rings unexpectedly and you have to contend with an entire conversation that you hadn’t planned for.
Literally the scariest object in your whole house.
4. Starting at a new school or job and being asked to provide a fun fact about yourself as an icebreaker.
5. The paradox of wanting to find someone to date but being way too terrified to actually approach anyone you see.
6. Online dating is just as nerve-racking and frustrating because you never feel comfortable reaching out to anyone.
And the prospect of actually meeting up in real life? dies
7. When your roommate invites their friends over without telling you first.
Oh god, strangers.
8. Trying to check if your roommate’s guests have left yet without anyone noticing you.
Ugh, if they see you then you have to actually come out and interact with them.
9. When your one friend at the party goes to the bathroom and you don’t know what else to do besides fiddle with your phone.
10. Or you’re expected to make small talk with the stranger you just met.
11. The terror of being asked to give a presentation at work or in class.
“My presentation is on—” throws up from fear
12. When the only contact information you have for someone is a phone number, so you’re forced to call.
13. When the Wi-Fi password isn’t posted at a coffee shop so you have to go up and ask for it yourself.
14. Literally everything about job interviews.
I’ll just be unemployed forever, I guess.
15. When you go up to the cashier at the supermarket and they start asking you questions.
I don’t care if you give me paper or plastic, just please let me stare at the ground in silence.
16. When your hairstylist attempts to make small talk.
17. The terror that happens when your boss asks you to come into his or her office “to chat.”
18. When your friend invites you out to meet up with some of his or her friends from work.
What if we take out the “friends from work” part of this plan?
19. Arriving late to a party and being way too overwhelmed by the sight of all the people there already.
20. When the salesperson at a clothing store asks if you need any help.
“No, I’m just browsing” really means “You could help, but I’m too afraid to interact with you.”
21. When your favorite song comes on and you want to dance, but feel really awkward about it.
Anything more than a little shuffle requires a whole bunch of alcohol.
22. Pushing your way up to the bar, but then freezing up when the bartender asks you what you want.
23. Being assigned a group project and trying to maintain your composure.
24. When you’re invited to happy hour but spend the whole time nursing your drink so you don’t have to actually talk with anyone.
25. When your friend throws a birthday party and you have to go even though you don’t really want to.
Happy birthday. I’ll be over on that chair in the corner.
26. When there’s no open table at a coffee shop but you’re too nervous to ask anyone if you can join them.
Because you just know that they don’t really want you there.