14 Things Everyone Who Loves Black Coffee Is Tired Of Hearing

Once you go black…

1. “How do you drink it like that?”

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It’s simple: You lift the cup, put it to your mouth, and take a sip.

2. “But isn’t it like so bitter and gross?”

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Obviously not if I’m drinking it right now.

3. “Did you always take it like that?”

Does it really matter?

4. “Do you just drink it like that to seem pretentious?”

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Ha, yeah you caught me.

5. “You must be a writer.”

You must be a psychic.

6. “Trying to stay up late?”

No, I take it like this all the time.

7. “I like black coffee also! With two sugars.”

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No, no, no, sweetie.

8. “So you probably like espresso too right?”

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Is that how it works?

9. Waitress: “Would you like cream or sugar?”

No.

10. Waitress: “Are you sure?”

Be gone.

11. “You take it black? Even iced coffee?”

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What wasn’t I clear about?

12. “I’ll take a vanilla latte with whipped cream.”

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*Gagging*

13. “I’m going to start drinking my coffee like that.”

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Good for you.

14. “Are you on a diet?”

Should I be?

They’ll never understand us.

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