1. Your diary is under your bed
If you’re stupid enough to write down all your secrets in a book, anyway.
2. The existence of the fridge
3. The food that belongs to you in the fridge
4. Your tickle weakness is under your arms
5. One embarrassing time you tore your trousers in town
6. They can use your collection of coloured pens
They are so going to lose the lids.
7. Your parents got mad at you the other night
(Could be used as ammunition)
8. You got so drunk you were throwing up on the street all night
(Could also be used as ammunition)
9. Blackmail is possible
(Using the ammunition)
10. The photos of your embarrassing childhood
11. You would do anything for money
Including tidying their room for them.
12. The names of anyone you fancy
ANYONE. Including celebrities.
13. Your embarrassing childhood nickname
Pukey? No, thanks.
15. Your secret sweet stash
16. You don’t know who plays for England, or understand the offside rule
And actually, that you couldn’t care less either.
17. The location of your make-up
18. Ditto for your clothes
19. The pet name you have for your boyfriend/girlfriend
20. You keep all your books in alphabetical order
21. Yes, they really are related to you
And they can’t get rid of you, either…