Books Your Children Read And Why You Should Too
Books parents that consider as too harsh for their children and restrict their children from reading it, may cause more harm than good. Reading those books yourself can increase a better relationship with your child and gives you many things to talk about. Reading from a perspective of someone who is relevant to the student's life will make you gain empathy for your child as well.
According to the article by Ivey & Johnson Engaging in Disturbing Books, "Books tend to reveal the consequences of bad choices through the eyes of characters with whom students identify. Readers wrestled with moral dilemmas and their implications hopefully before facing them in reality. In the process, they recruited trusted allies, including parents and other family members, for their per- pectives. When adolescents can choose young adult books that are personally relevant, that draw them into complex moral dilemmas, the lives they build at school and at home are more fulfilling and result in greater social, moral, and intellectual maturity, as well as academic competence." What Ivey & Johnson are saying is that the books that have explicit content or are "disturbing" cause positive effects on the readers. Their lives are more fulfilling and their relationships with their friends and families becomes more healthier and closer.
So why are these books still being banned from schools?
Books parents that consider as too harsh for their children and restrict their children from reading it, may cause more harm than good. Students are more engaged in books that are relevant to their lives. In a study that Ivey and Johnson did where they asked parents to observe the changes (if there was any) of their children when they engaged in disturbing books. They stated: "The parents indicated noticing similar growth, describing their teens as “more mature,” “more confident,” and “more enjoyable to be around” (147). Parents who once may have been opposed to their children reading those books, their perspectives were changed because of this study. Something that I want to accomplish in this post is to make your perspective change on if your child should read books that you or others may deem too disturbing for them.
1. Crank by Ellen Hopkins
Summary: Crank is about a young girl named Kristina who goes to visit her father. When visiting her father, she meets a guy, who introduces her to crank, a.k.a. meth. Soon, Kristina goes down into a spiral of addiction and bad decisions. Kristina's image of being a good girl and also being her alter ego, named Bree, are in a power struggle. Kristina wants to not depend on crank, but Bree is carefree. As this book continues, you get to see her struggle with addiction and her relationship with her mother and father.
I recently read this book for a middle school education class, and the main discussion about this book was if students should read this. I remember reading this when I was in middle school, and this book taught me much about the world I live in. My sheltered life was turned upside down when I read about a young girl who became addicted to meth. This book does have explicit language and content, but I can see this book as a great conversation starter between you and your children. The relationships in this book are great conversation starters and the topic of drugs as well.
2. The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas
Summary: Starr Carter is stuck in between two worlds, the poor neighborhood that she and her family live in, and the rich, white suburban prep school that she goes to. When going to a party in her neighborhood, Starr meets up with her childhood best friend Khalil. While talking to Khalil in his car, he gets pulled over by a cop, who ends up shooting and killing Khalil. Why? Because Khalil reached for his hairbrush. His death takes on headlines and media outlets are portraying Khalil as something he wasn't. The only person who was there and saw what happened, who could do something about it, is Starr.
If you have not read this book, I recommend you to go out and buy it now. This is a book about racism and police brutality. This is something this is currently going on in our society right now. One thing I say this book is great at teaching is empathy. This allows you to understand the perspective of a young African American girl. In the article Engaging in Disturbing Books, the authors state that students who imagine themselves into the minds of characters experiencing hardships developed empathy, which made them slower to judge and more likely to help others. This is once again, a great book to start a conversation with your child, to talk about the inequalities that still take place in our world, and what they can do to change it.
3. Two Boys Kissing by David Levithan
Summary: This is a story of Harry and Craig, two 17-year-olds who are about to take part in a 32-hour marathon of kissing to set a new Guinness World Record—all of which is narrated by a Greek Chorus of the generation of gay men lost to AIDS. While the two increasingly dehydrated and sleep-deprived boys are locking lips, they become a focal point in the lives of other teen boys dealing with languishing long-term relationships, coming out, navigating gender identity, and falling deeper into the digital rabbit hole of gay hookup sites—all while the kissing former couple tries to figure out their own feelings for each other. (via: Goodreads)
Recently, I went to a speech that was being given by the author. In his speech, he talked about how this book was banned, not because of the content, because nothing was explicit in the content. The reason the book was banned is because there were two boys on the front cover kissing. When he said that, my jaw hit the floor. I thought about how so many books in my school library that had two hetero people kissing on the front cover, and they weren't banned. This is a prime example of the hardships that LGBTQ+ community has to face. I think this book is perfect for parents because this gives them a better perspective. Being gay is not wrong and the more you know as a parent, the more accepting you truly become.
4. Are you there, God? It's Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
Summary: Margaret Simon, almost twelve, likes long hair, tuna fish, the smell of rain, and things that are pink. She’s just moved from New York City to Farbook, New Jersey, and is anxious to fit in with her new friends—Nancy, Gretchen, and Janie. When they form a secret club to talk about private subjects like boys, bras, and getting their first periods, Margaret is happy to belong.But none of them can believe Margaret doesn’t have religion, and that she isn’t going to the Y or the Jewish Community Center. What they don’t know is Margaret has her own very special relationship with God. She can talk to God about everything—family, friends, even Moose Freed, her secret crush. Margaret is funny and real, and her thoughts and feelings are oh-so-relatable—you’ll feel like she’s talking right to you, sharing her secrets with a friend. (via: Goodreads)
So, I want to say this a quintessential book for young adults to read when they are pre-teen and about to enter or just entered middle school. I remember reading this book when I was 11, which was over ten years ago. Now, this book may not seem "disturbing" to all, because it's not, but it still faces backlash from parents. Why? There are mentions of periods, bras, and young love. That's it. The reason I recommend you, the parent, to read this is because this book is something you and your young daughter (or son) to read together, especially if you are going through the experiences that Margaret is going through. One good thing about engaging in disturbing books that Ivey & Johnson mention is that it brings parent-child relationships closer. Parents begin to remember what it is like to be young again and children feel like now they can be comfortable to talk to their parents about things they weren't comfortable talking about before.
P.S. This is also going to be made into a movie soon, so even more reason to read it!
5. Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher
Summary: Clay Jensen returns home from school to find a strange package with his name on it lying on his porch. Inside he discovers several cassette tapes recorded by Hannah Baker–his classmate and crush–who committed suicide two weeks earlier. Hannah’s voice tells him that there are thirteen reasons why she decided to end her life. Clay is one of them. If he listens, he’ll find out why. Clay spends the night crisscrossing his town with Hannah as his guide. He becomes a firsthand witness to Hannah’s pain, and as he follows Hannah’s recorded words throughout his town, what he discovers changes his life forever. (via: Goodreads)
This series was pretty popular when I was in middle/high school. I remember getting this book as an Easter present when I was in sixth grade. One thing I can always be grateful to towards my parents is that they never censored what I read, which was the case for this book and many, many others. I turned out fine, I promise! I think this was the beginning of books that I read that held deeper meaning about serious issues. I remember reading this book and seeing how Hannah struggled with depression, which lead her to kill herself, I cried for the rest of the night. I read this book and mental illness became real to me. I haven't read this book since middle school, but I recently watched the TV show on Netflix, which I would also recommend you to watch if your more of a watcher than a reader. This book and show doesn't glorify suicide like many believe, instead it makes it real and it gives you a perspective of someone's life that otherwise you wouldn't get. Like I mentioned previously, it may have been awhile since you were a teenager and you might not exactly remember how you felt. Did you ever think when you were a teenager that your mom or dad just didn't understand you? That may be the case for your child as well. Which is why, books that are more relevant to your child's life are so important to read. If you and your child come together and read this book, you can truly understand what it is like to be your child. With social media and technology getting more and more prevalent, things are completely different than what it used to be in terms of school, society, and peer relationships.
6. Looking for Alaska by John Green
Summary: Have you ever thought about what people say before they die? The main character named Miles, a.k.a. Pudge, does. Miles, tired with his cookie cutter and lackluster life, decides to change schools and go to Culver Creek Preparatory Boarding School, where he meet Alaska and the Colonel. The trio become best friends and confide in each other, getting closer and closer every day. Miles begins to fall for Alaska and she may even be falling for him, but then she's gone. This is a book that follows the after effects of death and the absence of missing the person.
This book pretty much sums up my high school experience. What I mean is that this book was so popular and read almost by everyone. I'm pretty sure you could ask the class of 2015 what their favorite book was and they would say this. Why was it everyone's favorite book I always wondered. Now, after reading the article by Ivey and Johnson, when students are able to gain perspectives and read about disturbing events that happen, they are more likely to become more happy with their own life. This book had many ups and down. It dealt with sex, suicide, depression, underage drinking, etc. In fact, Looking for Alaska was the most challenged book of 2015 according to the American Library Association. This is such a great book for conversation with your children. There are so many things you and your child can discuss, which is why I recommend for you to read this.
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