Mommy Wars Through The Ages

    Moms have been battling each other since the dawn of time.

    Wendi Aarons
    by Wendi Aarons

    BuzzFeed Contributor

    50,000 B.C.: Reaching Milestones

    National Geographic / Via nationalgeographic.com

    "Little Glug Glug paint moose on cave wall."

    "So? Wakwak paint moose and sloth and use CONTOURING."

    Ancient Egypt, 3,000 B.C.: The diaper debate.

    Canava / Via canava.com

    "I use Nile river reed diapers because they're recyclable."

    "I only wrap my baby's tushie in linen. But I guess not everyone will grow up to be a Pharaoh."

    Ancient Greece, 500 B.C.: Push presents.

    AllPosters.com / Via imgc.allpostersimages.com

    "I feel so sorry for the women whose husbands don't carve a statue of them giving birth for their push present. #blessed"

    Ancient Rome, 100s: Spoiling your child.

    Anthony Baggett / Getty Images

    "She totally acts like her kid is a gift from The Gods."

    India, 900s: Volunteering guilt

    Intek1 / Getty Images

    "I'm getting a little tired of being the only one in these PTO meetings who volunteers to be President. And I'm also sick of your sitar music."

    China, 1200s: Drug-free birth.

    Wikipedia / Via en.wikipedia.org

    "Natural birth is the best way to have your baby."

    "Yeah, well, the opium I smoked during labor was pretty damn natural, Tammy."

    Italy, 1600s: Exposing kids to germs.

    WikiArt / Via wikiart.org

    "I believe that it's good for little Lucien to explore the world and build up his immunity."

    "I believe little Lucien is probably going to die from touching that shit."

    North America, 1700s: Working vs. staying home.

    Denver Post / Via denverpost.com

    "You Stay-At-Log-Cabin moms have it so easy."

    "I just hope your job churning butter fulfills you while someone else raises your youngfolk."

    Tahiti, 1800s: Breastfeeding in public.

    WikiArt / Via wikiart.org

    "Ugh, can't you at least cover up while you do that?"

    North America, 1905: Attachment parenting.

    Edward H. Boos

    "I believe in carrying my baby with my everywhere."

    "That's just because you don't have a car seat that fits on your bison."

    Japan, 1910s: Baby clothing.

    Polyvore / Via polyvore.com

    "I think babies should dress like babies."

    "I think babies should dress like Brooklyn coffee shop owners named Hambone."

    New York, 1920s: Free-range kids.

    Flickr / Via Flickr: blackheritage

    "I brought my children to the speakeasy again."

    "You helicopter moms are even worse than Prohibition. I let my kids walk home."

    Russia, 1950s: Giftedness.

    dic.academic.ru / Via dic.academic.ru

    "My brilliant son was just sent to Siberia to a special camp for gifted kids!"

    "Dumbass."

    Connecticut 1960s: Healthy eating.

    lamagarita / Via Flickr: lamagarita

    "Thanks for telling us about your garden, Jean, but every mom knows the freshest vegetables come from cans. You should really think about your kids' nutrition more."

    San Francisco, 1970s: Body after baby.

    Meappropriatestyle.com / Via meappropriatestyle.com

    "Moms who can't wear foxy halter tops two weeks after giving birth just aren't trying hard enough."

    Miami, 1980s: Sleep schedules.

    News.health.com / Via news.health.com

    "You let your baby cry it out until you were done watching Dynasty? I think your thong's on too tight, Misti."

    Portland, 1990s: Home schooling.

    blogger.com / Via blogger.com

    "My child needs a more nurturing environment, so I'm teaching him at home."

    "Well, you can bet your front pleats that I'm going to send my kids to public school."