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12 Things All People Who Love Spicy Foods Know To Be True

No lip balm after buffalo wings! Spicy food has its rewards, and for that pesky heartburn there's always TUMS Chewies.

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1. Everything is better with hot sauce.

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There are no exceptions.

2. Jalapeños in all the drinks please.

Paprika optional and preferred and thank you.
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Paprika optional and preferred and thank you.

3. Milk is your friend.

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His archenemy, water, is not.

4. Always have emergency bread on hand.

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Useful for spicy emergencies as well as sandwich emergencies.

5. Clearing up your sinuses can be fun!

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...is what you tell yourself as you cry over your kamikaze buffalo wings.

6. One person's hot is another person's mild.

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You got spicy swagger!

7. Your stomach can handle anything!

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Or so you'd like to think.

8. Sweating is a mild price to pay for spicy satisfaction.

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Be one with the sweat. You are the sweat. There is no sweat.

9. You must fear and respect the Carolina Reaper.

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The hottest pepper in the world could bring you down if you're not careful.

10. There is crying in cooking (when they're tears of spicy joy)!

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Sure, it's emotional, but at least you've lived.

11. Don't let them see that you're burning on the inside.

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You have a reputation to uphold... you sissy.

12. NEVER TOUCH YOUR EYES.

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The only exception is if— NO! NEVER.

The best poutine is a spicy poutine.

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And the worst poutine is— nope, no such thing.