1. Because the only exercise you've gotten lately is jumping over puddles.
2. Because this is a sorry excuse for a room with a view:
3. And these guys are an even sorrier excuse for "wildlife":
4. Because standing in line — even for dang delicious burgers — is bad for your back.
5. Because this is your idea of a beautiful landscape at this point:
6. And you know what this is gonna smell like come August:
7. Because no matter how you get to work in the morning...
8. ...you're bound to have a bad time.
9. Because you can't remember the last time you ate a meal sitting down.
10. And the last warm breeze you felt blowing through your hair came from a passing subway.
11. Because they're allowed to start working two hours before you even get out of bed:
12. Because "Ladies and gentlemen, IT'S SHOWTIME," and you have a migraine.
13. Basically, the city never sleeps, and you could really use some shuteye.
14. And because if hell is other people, heaven must be a beach at sunset.
Don't you think it's time you took a break? Head to Fiji, where happiness finds you.
