1.
You can dance with playful grace and ease that is uncannily similar to an angel twirling in the wind.
2.
Your wardrobe is so much more than unironed polos and khakis.
3.
You have a more positive outlook on life because you are a whimsical creature of beauty and love.
4.
You don’t have a scraggly unkempt beard and/or mustache because your face has the flawless smoothness of a baby’s skin.
5.
You’ve never cheated on him because swooning over Bradley Cooper’s Esquire cover is not considered cheating.
6.
You make your own money, honey.
7.
Your friends don’t approve of him because they know that underneath it all, you’re a blossoming flower that has yet to blossom to its fullest.
8.
You smell like a mix of sweet honeysuckle and cool coconut breeze that makes heads spin for miles upon miles.
9.
Your nails are an extension of your inner fabulous self, and you’ve even been mistaken for a hand supermodel.
10.
Your bedroom is reminiscent of an Amazonian rainforest.
11.
You eat your meal one bite at a time, with dignity and poise.
12.
You have more goals and motivation because you know you’re destined to be the ruler of your own universe.
13.
So if he ever does you wrong, leave his ass in the grass because you’re a beautiful dove who needs to fly free.
Watch The Other Woman team up on him , in theaters April 25!
