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People Share What They've Gotten Away With In Front Of Parents

OK seriously. HOW did we ever get away with these things?!

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1. The 12-Year-Old Driver

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"One night when I was 12 years old, my parents went out to dinner. I was annoyed that they didn't get me a movie rental from Blockbuster, so I grabbed my mom's car keys and drove myself. My mom wondered the next day why her seat was raised so much, and I never said a word."

—M.F.

2. Washing Machine Cooler

"I used the washing machine as the beer cooler for a sleepover, filled it with ice and beer, waited for them to leave, and drank and drained it all before they returned."

—M.E.D.

3. Taking Flight

"Boy, oh boy, do I have a great story about accidentally taking mushrooms before a flight for you..."

—S.P.

4. Grandma's Diamonds

"When I was in fifth grade, I found my grandmother's diamond wedding bands. I would wear them to school every day but take them off before I got in the car when my mom picked me up. I did that for a couple of months."

—"Can't share that on FB because my mother follows me"

5. Ice Cream Sandwiches

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"One time in high school, I got high in my room. I got so high. So, so high. Then I went downstairs and ate an ice cream sandwich. Then I ate another, and another, and another. I ate about seven ice cream sandwiches.

"I was lying on the couch, stoned out of my gourd and watching TV, when my dad looked at me, held up the garbage can full of ice cream sandwich wrappers, and said, 'Who ate all the ice cream sandwiches?' I just raised my hand with little effort and said, 'Me.' He shook his head and said, 'I'm not buying 'em anymore' and went back into the garage."

—B.C.

6. Backyard Parking

"I was gonna have my boyfriend over to have the sex while my parents were away, but I didn't want the neighbors to see a strange car in the driveway next to our extra car. So, with what I thought was a brilliant move, I parked his car in the driveway and moved our car to the backyard.

"Then we had the sex. THEN I LOST THE KEYS TO OUR CAR.

"He left. My parents came home. They either believed my terrible excuse about having a friend over and not wanting other friends to drive by and see that we were hanging out without them, or they were too busy trying to help me find the keys."

—"Keep anon and change the name? thx."

7. The Ornament

"I broke my dad's beloved ceramic Mighty Mouse Christmas tree ornament. Broke the foot right off. I was nine. I thought I was going to die by his hand. I am happy to report that I chose fight instead of flight. Never felt so focused in my life. I found a hot glue gun, reattached the foot, sanded off the extra glue, and repainted the fucked-up ankle. He didn't notice for 11 years."

—K.R.

8. Siblings in the Bahamas

"My sister took a trip to the Bahamas without telling our parents...and she would have gotten away without anyone in the family ever knowing, EXCEPT she ran into my brother, who was also in the Bahamas (parents knew about his trip). He sent a pic to my other brother and me saying, 'Don't tell Mom.'"

—"They still don't know, so..."

9. Big Parties and Pool Table Sex

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"I def snuck my BF into the house, and he slept over a few times without them knowing. I also had a few close calls when my dad came home from work early, and I was having sex with my BF on the pool table in the basement. I also threw parties when they went out of town. Like, big ones."

—K.D.

10. "Food Poisoning"

"I drank half a fifth of green-apple vodka at a concert my senior year of high school and got kicked out after projectile vomiting on the row of people behind me. When I got home super early, I told my mom I had food poisoning from a pizza restaurant and went straight to bed."

—"I think I got away with it. Please don't tell her about this."

11. Behind the Door

"I was staying at home with my parents the summer after my freshman year of college. The night before my birthday, my girlfriend asked if she could stay over since we were taking a trip the next day. She parked her car at the church up the street, and I picked her up. I snuck her into my bedroom through the downstairs door.

"We woke up the next morning with my dad knocking and yelling at me to open up. Meanwhile, my girlfriend was naked in the bed next to me, completely mortified. I told her to hide behind the door, unlocked the door, and had a 15-minute conversation with my dad while my naked girlfriend stood right on the other side.

"When we left for our trip, I had her run through the woods to get to my car in the driveway, and she lay down on the floorboard while I drove away, my mom waving from the door saying, 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!'"

—"They can never know that happened. Keep it anonymous."

12. The Passcode

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"When my family got satellite TV, my mom set aggressive parental controls. Everything was blocked, so I had to ask her to enter a four-digit passcode whenever I wanted to watch something as harmless as Goodbye, Mr. Chips.

"This led to my scheme: In the basement, I set up two hidden 8mm camcorders. Then a friend and I hit record and called my mom down to unlock something innocuous. She entered the code and went back upstairs. My friend and I immediately reviewed the tape, watching the movement of her thumb to the buttons on the remote. We punched in a few guesses until — bingo! — we were in.

"We sat back on the couch and surveyed all that was open to us in the channel guide before finally settling for a low-budget feature called Busty Cops.

"My mom doesn't know, and the code still works."

—T.S.

13. Sleepwalking or...

"The night before I left for law school, I got so drunk I pissed down the steps of my boyhood home. To this day, my parents believe I was sleepwalking."

—E.S.

14. Not Not Home for Spring Break

"One time, I told my parents I wasn't coming home for spring break, but I did, and I stayed the whole week at my friend's house that was two blocks from my parents' house. Everywhere I went, I had to keep an eye out for them."

—E.S. (again)

15. Just Like Regular Chickens

"One time, I had family dinner with my parents while tripping my balls off on shrooms. I had dosed earlier in the day, and it was several hours later, and I thought I was cool to mingle with society. I was horribly mistaken.

"Mom made fried chicken, and while the meal was great, I couldn't stop having Eraserhead-esque visions on the plate with the mantra 'Just like regular chickens' repeating through my head. How they never caught on, I'll never know."

—"Yeah, please keep this one anonymous."

Oh WOW. Watch chaos and family secrets unfold on The Detour, premiering Monday, April 11, at 9 p.m. ET/8 CT on TBS.

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What’s the riskiest thing YOU'VE ever gotten away with right under your parents' noses? Let us know in the comments below!

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