Making Psychological Labor Visible: A Post-It Note Project

I have a really involved and willing husband (let me just say that from the get-go). Now that our kids are mostly grown, I have noticed that all the invisible work of being a mom hasn't really stopped. I started to realize the repeating cycle of lists that would run in my head every time I entered a room. I couldn't open the refrigerator without saying to myself, "God, I have to clean this. How are we on milk? Do we need sour cream? How old is that cottage cheese? Shoot, we need yogurt." I would brush my teeth and be seeing the dust behind the sink, towels that needed to be washed. These things I realize run constantly in the background of my head. The things that just sit out because it's not on anyone's radar but mine. I realized that it would be impossible to "teach" others what is just so ingrained in my head already. So, one day, I just decided to make it VISIBLE. I've started putting post-its on all the things I see what I walk into a room. And I love this because there's no blame or critique or exasperation. It just IS. My husband walked into the kitchen and just said, "Whoa...What can we do to fix this?" He saw what I see...every time I walk in that room. I used pink for tasks that need to be done everyday, all the time; orange for things that stay done temporarily (paying bills) and black for things that just need to be done once (like painting a shelf). Seeing how many pink tasks points to why this work is so burdensome...it just never stays done. (It should also be noted that we don't have small children. There are millions of un-post-it-able things that moms keep track of with little ones around. Maybe those just go on the window.) Grab your post-its and make these things visible. Just doing it has made me feel a little lighter.