1.
Get off and wait for the next train.
2.
Commit the cardinal sin of standing on the left side of the escalator.
3.
Pretend to be asleep for the entirety of your journey.
4.
Get off a stop early and walk the rest of the way.
5.
Give up your seat on every journey between now and infinity.
6.
Sit next to someone on the bus with a particularly noxious kebab.
7.
Never sit at the front of the DLR ever again.
8.
Take a longer, more expensive, nonsensical route.
9.
Get intentionally stuck behind dawdling tourists when you're in a bit of a rush.
10.
Chow down your morning coffee's cardboard cup for breakfast every single day.
11.
Get smacked in the face every 30 seconds with an oversized rucksack on a crowded carriage.
12.
Listen to the same tinny rendition of a '90s pop hit for 45 minutes on repeat.
13.
Be dragged through the streets of London by a Santander Cycle.
14.
Never getting to sit down on your commute again, due to the seats being forever occupied by people's feet.
15.
Be sneezed on by a never-ending succession of commuters on a cramped train.
16.
Never again experiencing the joy of seeing an empty carriage pull up in front of you.
