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29 Indisputable Truths About British Television

"The Come Dine With Me intro is so decadent and classy when really all you're gonna see is Linda from Stoke on Trent serving up a spag bol."

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1. On Come Dine With Me:

the come dine with me intro is so decadent and classy when really all you're gonna see is Linda from Stoke on Trent serving up a spag bol

2. On The Great British Bake Off:

3. On Planet Earth 2:

Attenborough has no respect for crabs. Always gives them ridiculous music. They are jesters to him

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5. On Gogglebox:

6. On Q.I.:

7. On Grand Designs:

Grand Designs be like: I rock climb for a living and my wife sells umbrella insurance. We have a budget of 1.3 million

8. On The Jeremy Kyle Show:

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9. On Homes Under The Hammer:

Why does Homes Under the Hammer film the estimates at jaunty angles

10. On First Dates:

Literally every episode of First Dates: Me: OMG they're so cute together they're gonna get married Them: I see us more as friends

11. On Midsomer Murders:

12. On The Eurovision Song Contest:

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14. On Broadchurch:

My plan with #broadchurch; say 'it could be him' about every character so when the culprit is finally revealed I can say 'I said it was him'

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17. On Masterchef:

Gregg Wallace is like that relation that you don't know how they're related to u. Your second cousin twice removed thats not actually a chef

18. On University Challenge:

The most mind blowing part of University Challenge is when they show the wide shot of the studio at the end and the teams are side by side.

19. On Antiques Roadshow:

Just once I would like to see this on #antiquesroadshow

20. On Hollyoaks:

Tony still being in hollyoaks is the one constant in life

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22. On Masterchef:

Me: cannot cook Also me but watching masterchef: hahaha fucking polenta with that, you're having a laugh aren't you

23. On Strictly Come Dancing:

*waits patiently for Strictly Come Dancing to come back on so I have a connection with my mother again*

24. On Grand Designs:

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26. On TOWIE:

#TOWIE convo starter. Hey. You alright. Yeah you. Yeah good. Good.

27. On Question Time:

Next week's Question Time panel looks good

28. On The Great British Bake Off:

29. On Eastenders: