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Haven't you ever wondered, if I were a nonliving thing from the minds of David Lynch and Mark Frost, what would I be? Well, now you can find out.

Which Inanimate Object from Twin Peaks are You?

Which hobby would you most likely pursue?

Which of these examples of plant life most appeals to you?

You're at the Roadhouse when, in the booth next to you, a young man with an angular face grabs a girl by the throat. He makes lewd remarks and does not let her go. What do you do?

What kind of day is your favorite?

Choose a toy!

How do you feel about photos of yourself?

Which sound do you prefer?

Which of these places looks like home?

The body is made up of:

What is your favorite thing about nature?

You have been arrested for murdering someone who lives in your town. Did you do it?

Which character on Twin Peaks do you most identify with?

Where you came from, and what your purpose is...nobody knows for sure. You certainly seem dangerous though, despite your innocuous exterior. Some advice for the future: try not to allow so many ghosts haunt you. In the long run, the fact that you're holding on to such negative things is sure to lead to a bursting forth of destruction.

The Glass Mystery Box

You are in a perpetual stasis. Ask yourself, "why do I never say 'go'"? It's time you let loose just a bit so you can experience the world. And although everyone who encounters you is likely watching you very closely, just remember that you are the one who calls the shots. You can define your own destiny!

Stoplight

Pure pain and suffering! Literally, evil things are fueled by you. How did you get to be this way? Based on your appearance, you were once wholesome. You seem like the type who is tied to nature, and may even have a rich native background. Somehow though, you have become the malevolent thing that you are! Maybe it is time you tried to spew forth from the clutches of evil.

Garmonbozia

It's a world of truck drivers, and you are the naughty artifact at the center of it all. You put on no airs whatsoever, and there is no chance that you'll ever make a false first impression. You see yourself as a sexual being, and you want to share it with the world! Of course, that means that from time to time, you're gonna become the subject of a homicide case. So, just prepare yourself if you insist on continuing to exist in such a fashion!

A Copy of Flesh World

You are not the type to tolerate cockamamie. When you see a problem with the world, you get in the thick of it and start trying to make things right. To boot, you do it with style! Of course, you do need a little push to get going, but that's nothing to be ashamed of. Just be careful that you don't claim to be able to handle jobs that are too big for you.

A Gold Shit-Digging Shovel

People generally avoid you because you carry a lot of negative and even dangerous baggage. You're also the type who bounces from person to person, wreaking havoc. Perhaps it would be best if you found one person to settle with for a while, so you don't destroy so many lives. Granted, you don't mean anyone harm; you just seem to invite trouble. Try thinking of others in the future. Perhaps it would be prudent to bury yourself away until someone who can handle you comes along?

Mike's Ring

It's a shame that you never manage to make yourself feel whole. It's like something is missing. You seem to enjoy travel, and the companionship of a variety of people; but, maybe it's time to settle down? Find someone you can hang around with forever, so you aren't getting caught up in the drama that comes with being "Be Fri" with so many different people? You're a darling, really. Just a little abused, though. Stop letting others take advantage of your sweetness.

Half of Laura's Best Friends Necklace

What an incredible memory you have! You like to observe the world and log every possible detail. It's really useful, too. Sometimes you manage to capture things that others would not notice, and for that reason others find you indispensable to their work. Keep it up, but don't forget to take some time for yourself!

Special Agent Dale Cooper's Cassette Recorder

You seem to be everywhere! Appearing in unexpected places, with a variety of crowds, you really know how to make yourself fit into just about any situation. \*applause\* Although, sometimes it seems like you don't know how to bow out gracefully. You have been seen hanging out in the background, long after everyone else has left the party. You should work on that so you don't make your slight oddness so obvious.

A Red Balloon

Some say being in the company of you is like heaven! You're sweet, and you have a way of warming the heart. It's no wonder so many people like you! Just watch out that you don't find yourself wasting away, trying to please everyone. There's only so much of you to go around, after all.

A Slice of Cherry Pie and Cup of Coffee from The Double R

Only a select few get to know the real you, though many have heard of you. You guard your secrets, and only the tightest lipped of your peers ever get a glimpse of what's really going on in your life. For the most part, this is a great strategy; although, there are times when your secretiveness might leave others unable to lend a helping hand when it's needed. When your friends are all shrugged shoulders and upturned palms, know that you probably could have given them just a little more to go on!

Lil's Blue Rose

Some would say the worst among us are those who watch bad things happen, and just stand by. That's you. You loom when bad shit is going down, but you don't do anything about it! It's almost like you set evil deeds in motion in any situation, simply via your presence! I know it doesn't seem like you can really do much to change any given situation, but maybe it would be a bit more empathetic to flip your own switch, instead of waiting for someone else to tell you when to change? At the very least, try to cut back on the rubbernecking.

The Ceiling Fan in the Palmer's House

When someone needs to be told the truth, you aren't afraid to speak up. You're the one people turn to when they need help getting others to leave them alone, or at least be quiet! The best part is that you manage not to be off-putting as you keep order. There's just something about the look of you that people find endearing, which means you can get away with being kind of bossy.

Hawk's Donut Disturb Sign

You're the one that everyone turns to for answers and advice. It's almost like you have a sixth sense for things, because you always seem to know what's going on and then some. On top of that, you're mysterious and you have a way of making it seem like you didn't do anything at all, often letting others take the credit for delivering your observations. Everyone needs a friend like you!

The Log

As a person who once stood proud and tall, you have as of late let yourself come crashing down to reality. Perhaps you're too hard on yourself, even. At this point it is going to take someone else to lift you up, that much is clear. You have a lot to offer the world, if you can just find your place again. Don't feel bad. All of us have to spend a little time in contemplation in order to be our best selves. Just don't spend too much time down there.

Deer Head that Fell off the Wall at the Twin Peaks Sheriff's Station

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Which Inanimate Object from Twin Peaks are You?

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Which Inanimate Object from Twin Peaks are You?

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