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Which Inanimate Object from Twin Peaks are You?

Haven't you ever wondered, if I were a nonliving thing from the minds of David Lynch and Mark Frost, what would I be? Well, now you can find out.

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  1. Which hobby would you most likely pursue?

    Making balloon animals.
    Something quiet, like knitting.
    Model train engineering. Choo choo! Slow down, train! Stop, train!
    Creating violent art that upsets people.
    Journaling, so I can keep a record of everything.
    Telling fortunes. Maybe with tarot cards or by reading palms.
    Photography. I just like to watch things.
    Trapping things for sport. Maybe insects and one day, bigger and more dangerous animals.
    Reading and responding to mail from strangers.
    Something productive! I want to get rid of useless things and replace them with good things!
    Fashion and design. I would like to add subtle touches to my wardrobe.
    Kite flying. I'd like to be carried away by the air of the breezy outdoors.
    Something most people would be advised to avoid, like breeding venomous animals.
    Baking and cooking. I think I'm probably a natural in the kitchen.
    Nothing. I always manage to do things half way, so it wouldn't be worth it.
  2. Which of these examples of plant life most appeals to you?

  3. You're at the Roadhouse when, in the booth next to you, a young man with an angular face grabs a girl by the throat. He makes lewd remarks and does not let her go. What do you do?

    I'm not really involved with this, I'm just sort of hanging out in the room. I don't do anything.
    I could tell you what I think of this, but I'm not really comfortable revealing my opinion.
    I grab the man and put him in a choke hold.
    I yell "Hey! Don't do that! Stop!"
    I actually sort of enjoy this scene.
    I look the man in the eye and, in a calm and polite manner, tell him to leave the girl alone.
    I saw this coming when I first laid eyes on him. I can't do anything to change it.
    I'm having enough trouble getting myself off of the floor. I can't be worried about them.
    I just watch.
    I video the whole thing and upload it to the internet for everyone else to see.
    I get right in there and pull her away from that sick guy! He's what's wrong with the world!
    That guy is actually a friend of mine, so I feel a bit responsible. But...I also didn't make the girl go over there. So, it's not like I really brought them together. I feel a little guilty, but not enough to stop him.
    I take a mental account of what's happening and then report it.
    I stand nearby and cry until the man stops. Then I hug the girl and make sure she is okay.
    I know how the girl feels. I go over and take her hand, and say "please let my friend go."
  4. What kind of day is your favorite?

    One with a birthday party!
    I prefer the night, actually.
    One in which I get to do something special by myself, that's just for me.
    A day spent in bed with someone sexy.
    I like a good day spent fixing stuff that needs to be tended to.
    A day that I can be with my best friend the whole time.
    Any day is good as long as I only have to do the things I want to do, and nobody else gets to decide how I spend it.
    I like a day that goes by very slowly.
    Any day I manage to get up is a good one.
    One in which everyone leaves me alone! *smiley face*
    Honestly, my favorite day involves me getting into some trouble, but someone else takes the fall for it.
    Come over and I'll show you my favorite kind of day. (You should not take my advice)
    If I can make someone else's day good, then that's my favorite day.
    If I can study something and take a lot of notes, I will enjoy the day.
    I'd rather watch other people's day.
  5. Choose a toy!

  6. How do you feel about photos of yourself?

    I would rather see candid photos of others.
    I always seem to be photographed from a weird angle.
    Photos make me feel half finished, like I forgot something while I was getting ready.
    I like to take about thirty selfies of myself at a time, so I can go through and pick which ones stay and which ones go.
    When someone points a camera at me, I instinctively say "Don't take my photo! Stop!"
    I always smile in photographs. Who wants to see a grumpy, serious face?!
    I try my best to look sexy in every photograph.
    If it were up to me, all photos would be posed. I prefer to set everything up so it's perfect, and fix any parts of the image that don't look right.
    I'll allow my photo to be taken at the appropriate time. Sometimes I say "no" and tell the photographer to leave me alone.
    I'd rather be the one taking photos of everyone and everything else!
    I take lots of selfies, and like to make other people jealous or offended by them.
    Nobody ever seems to photograph me directly, but I manage to show up in the background a lot.
    I don't really like photos. I think the Native Americans were right about a photo taking part of your existence. I'd rather not make duplicates of myself.
    I find that photos of myself draw a lot of unwanted attention.
    I only let a select few people take my photo, because they understand me and will not use it for frivolous or negative purposes. They will capture me best.
  7. Which sound do you prefer?

    The sound of someone on a voicemail.
    The wind blowing, with natural ambient sounds in the background.
    Tires screeching.
    The clatter of utensils and voices in a diner.
    Someone in high heels walking down a hallway.
    Someone else's overheard conversation.
    A sensual moan.
    A construction crew at work.
    Silence or a noise machine, so I can focus.
    Cicadas chirping.
    The drumming of rain on a window.
    A scream of anguish or fear.
    Aggressive music recommended by a friend.
    An owl, hooting in the distance.
    Objects crashing to the floor.
  8. Which of these places looks like home?

  9. The body is made up of:

    Blood
    Muscle
    Bone
    Flesh
    Sweat
    Fingernails
    Organs
    Senses
    Hair
    Heart
    Cells
    Noises
    Bacteria
    Shadows
    Tissue
  10. What is your favorite thing about nature?

    I love how little things are always happening that you have to pay attention for.
    Nature has a very calming effect on most people. I like how it does that.
    I apprecaite that we can never know everything about nature. There will always be some secrets hidden in it.
    You can sit and watch it all day and not get bored.
    The way it makes me feel secluded.
    I just feel like I belong there. Like I am a part of nature.
    The view up high is so different from the view down low, but they are both interesting.
    It's neat that nature can be manipulated, if we want.
    Nature moves really slowly, and it almost makes it feel like time stops.
    Destruction is a part of nature.
    I like how it carries on of its own volition. Animals and plants procreate without instruction, and everything perpetuates itself.
    Nature does not need us to save it! I love that it could wipe us all out if it wanted.
    I always find something interesting and unexpected in nature.
    When I am with someone I care about, I feel more connected to them if we are in a natural setting.
    Nature is pretty to take photos and footage of. I like to document what I see there.
  11. You have been arrested for murdering someone who lives in your town. Did you do it?

    I didn't do it, but I allowed someone else I know to do it.
    I didn't do it. I am more worried about my own problems than the need for someone else to die.
    I tried to stop the person who did it, so it wasn't me.
    I didn't do it, but I did see something that night, and have information about the person who did.
    Definitely. It was me.
    I didn't do it and I wish everyone would drop this and leave me alone!
    I didn't kill the person, but I was having a secret affair with them. Some of the things we got up to would probably shock most people.
    I watched the whole thing happen, but I'm going to abstain from sharing that information. I don't like to get involved.
    I didn't do it, and I don't really know who did. I am ready to pitch in to help solve the case, though! Let's catch this murderer!
    People only think I did it because it seems like I know what really happened.
    I didn't do it, but I feel really guilty because I introduced the victim to the murderer. It might as well have been me.
    I could never do that! I am a really nice person who cares about others.
    I didn't do it, but I also don't have an alibi. It will be hard to convict me because I am involved with a lot of different groups of people, who will give conflicting reports.
    I didn't do it! I was in the vicinity, but not at the crime scene.
    I took intricate notes on what happened. Let me show you.
  12. Which character on Twin Peaks do you most identify with?

Which Inanimate Object from Twin Peaks are You?

You got: The Glass Mystery Box

Where you came from, and what your purpose is...nobody knows for sure. You certainly seem dangerous though, despite your innocuous exterior. Some advice for the future: try not to allow so many ghosts haunt you. In the long run, the fact that you're holding on to such negative things is sure to lead to a bursting forth of destruction.

The Glass Mystery Box
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You got: Stoplight

You are in a perpetual stasis. Ask yourself, "why do I never say 'go'"? It's time you let loose just a bit so you can experience the world. And although everyone who encounters you is likely watching you very closely, just remember that you are the one who calls the shots. You can define your own destiny!

Stoplight
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You got: Garmonbozia

Pure pain and suffering! Literally, evil things are fueled by you. How did you get to be this way? Based on your appearance, you were once wholesome. You seem like the type who is tied to nature, and may even have a rich native background. Somehow though, you have become the malevolent thing that you are! Maybe it is time you tried to spew forth from the clutches of evil.

Garmonbozia
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You got: A Copy of Flesh World

It's a world of truck drivers, and you are the naughty artifact at the center of it all. You put on no airs whatsoever, and there is no chance that you'll ever make a false first impression. You see yourself as a sexual being, and you want to share it with the world! Of course, that means that from time to time, you're gonna become the subject of a homicide case. So, just prepare yourself if you insist on continuing to exist in such a fashion!

A Copy of Flesh World
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You got: A Gold Shit-Digging Shovel

You are not the type to tolerate cockamamie. When you see a problem with the world, you get in the thick of it and start trying to make things right. To boot, you do it with style! Of course, you do need a little push to get going, but that's nothing to be ashamed of. Just be careful that you don't claim to be able to handle jobs that are too big for you.

A Gold Shit-Digging Shovel
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You got: Mike's Ring

People generally avoid you because you carry a lot of negative and even dangerous baggage. You're also the type who bounces from person to person, wreaking havoc. Perhaps it would be best if you found one person to settle with for a while, so you don't destroy so many lives. Granted, you don't mean anyone harm; you just seem to invite trouble. Try thinking of others in the future. Perhaps it would be prudent to bury yourself away until someone who can handle you comes along?

Mike's Ring
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You got: Half of Laura's Best Friends Necklace

It's a shame that you never manage to make yourself feel whole. It's like something is missing. You seem to enjoy travel, and the companionship of a variety of people; but, maybe it's time to settle down? Find someone you can hang around with forever, so you aren't getting caught up in the drama that comes with being "Be Fri" with so many different people? You're a darling, really. Just a little abused, though. Stop letting others take advantage of your sweetness.

Half of Laura's Best Friends Necklace
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You got: Special Agent Dale Cooper's Cassette Recorder

What an incredible memory you have! You like to observe the world and log every possible detail. It's really useful, too. Sometimes you manage to capture things that others would not notice, and for that reason others find you indispensable to their work. Keep it up, but don't forget to take some time for yourself!

Special Agent Dale Cooper's Cassette Recorder
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You got: A Red Balloon

You seem to be everywhere! Appearing in unexpected places, with a variety of crowds, you really know how to make yourself fit into just about any situation. *applause* Although, sometimes it seems like you don't know how to bow out gracefully. You have been seen hanging out in the background, long after everyone else has left the party. You should work on that so you don't make your slight oddness so obvious.

A Red Balloon
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You got: A Slice of Cherry Pie and Cup of Coffee from The Double R

Some say being in the company of you is like heaven! You're sweet, and you have a way of warming the heart. It's no wonder so many people like you! Just watch out that you don't find yourself wasting away, trying to please everyone. There's only so much of you to go around, after all.

A Slice of Cherry Pie and Cup of Coffee from The Double R
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You got: Lil's Blue Rose

Only a select few get to know the real you, though many have heard of you. You guard your secrets, and only the tightest lipped of your peers ever get a glimpse of what's really going on in your life. For the most part, this is a great strategy; although, there are times when your secretiveness might leave others unable to lend a helping hand when it's needed. When your friends are all shrugged shoulders and upturned palms, know that you probably could have given them just a little more to go on!

Lil's Blue Rose
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You got: The Ceiling Fan in the Palmer's House

Some would say the worst among us are those who watch bad things happen, and just stand by. That's you. You loom when bad shit is going down, but you don't do anything about it! It's almost like you set evil deeds in motion in any situation, simply via your presence! I know it doesn't seem like you can really do much to change any given situation, but maybe it would be a bit more empathetic to flip your own switch, instead of waiting for someone else to tell you when to change? At the very least, try to cut back on the rubbernecking.

The Ceiling Fan in the Palmer's House
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You got: Hawk's Donut Disturb Sign

When someone needs to be told the truth, you aren't afraid to speak up. You're the one people turn to when they need help getting others to leave them alone, or at least be quiet! The best part is that you manage not to be off-putting as you keep order. There's just something about the look of you that people find endearing, which means you can get away with being kind of bossy.

Hawk's Donut Disturb Sign
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You got: The Log

You're the one that everyone turns to for answers and advice. It's almost like you have a sixth sense for things, because you always seem to know what's going on and then some. On top of that, you're mysterious and you have a way of making it seem like you didn't do anything at all, often letting others take the credit for delivering your observations. Everyone needs a friend like you!

The Log
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You got: Deer Head that Fell off the Wall at the Twin Peaks Sheriff's Station

As a person who once stood proud and tall, you have as of late let yourself come crashing down to reality. Perhaps you're too hard on yourself, even. At this point it is going to take someone else to lift you up, that much is clear. You have a lot to offer the world, if you can just find your place again. Don't feel bad. All of us have to spend a little time in contemplation in order to be our best selves. Just don't spend too much time down there.

Deer Head that Fell off the Wall at the Twin Peaks Sheriff's Station
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