1.
You’ve focused all your attention on horse girls and car boys you turned your back on the most chilling evil: adults way too into Disney
2.
how I, a millennial, filter spam calls: -if my phone rings, it's spam
3.
you all love ur boyfriends but do u love them more then u loved one direction in 2012
4.
I sent my kids to the store to get some snacks for themselves. My daughter got a birthday cake. For a snack.
5.
midwest people take tornadoes as seriously as lactose intolerant people take not eating cheese
6.
and i OOP girl shock me like an electric eel
7.
No one: My fat ass after a meal: mmmmm now i want something sweet
8.
My grandma deadass just served my kids nuggets and fries in their fucking kiddie pool 😂💀
9.
unfollowing people from high school is a form of self care
10.
who is in charge of naming the poor kittens at austin pets alive
11.
Lulu ain’t allowed in my apartment complex so this is how I gotta sneak her out every morning .
12.
me talking about one direction to my mom when I was 14 my mom
13.
I made something perfect today
14.
So bought 2 FEMALE dwarf hamsters 32 days ago. Woke up this morning to 22 dwarf hamsters in the cage because Belle is actually a male? Ok. Thanks pets at home.
15.
Co workers: can you come in today? Co— star: say no
16.
every time i say my cat’s name she looks at me like i just told her that her husband died at sea
17.
ladies..... u got a freckle on the middle of ur wrist or is this a myth lmao
18.
character development
19.
promiscuous girl, promiscuous boy, wherever you are you already know im all alone and its that im all yours you that I want what u waiting for?
20.
Waiting in lines in women’s bathrooms at bars is literally like this and I am so here for it. This pep talk deserves a million retweets
21.
Disney can’t do a live action remake of The Goofy Movie because there’s no one hot enough to play Max
22.
I’m just trying to feed my baby
23.
Idk who started the trend of putting acrylics on photos of chris evans but please don’t stop
24.
ohhh cathi... how I love you
25.
nobody: 11 yr old relationships:
26.
Why “go off” when you can go home