Warning: This post discusses sexual harassment.
Unfortunately, to be a woman in the world means you're probably going to have to deal with creepy/inappropriate behavior from men. And the worst part? Most of these men like to wax poetic about what "nice guys" they are.
So when Reddit user u/TristanAurelius asked, "Women who ghosted a 'nice guy' friend after he did something creepy, what was it?" I knew that the responses were going to sadly be all too relatable. Here are just a few that prove why it can sometimes be so difficult for women to feel safe around men and trust their intentions.
1. "He punched a wall until his knuckles were all bloody and sent me the pictures because I was on a date and didn’t respond to his texts for like 3 hours. He was 'mad at himself' that he was jealous, and 'had to punish himself.'"
2. "He messaged my dad on Facebook to tell him that he was his 'nemesis' because I wouldn't hang out with him on my dad's birthday."
3. "He showed up at my work uninvited and hid around a corner. Then he texted me that I looked great in my sweater."
4. "He said he was feeling lonely and asked for a hug. I'm not generally a hugger, but I gave him a hug and he went straight in for the kiss. I don't think I've ever backed away from anyone else that fast."
5. "I caught him sneakily recording a video of me without my consent during a pool party. He claimed he didn't even know his phone was recording, and that it was an accident, so I asked to see his phone to verify and he refused. It was a friend's birthday party so I didn't make waves (didn't want to ruin the party for the birthday girl), but I promptly blocked that guy on everything and never spoke to him again."
6. "He asked me for pictures of my feet, and when I said 'f*ck no,' he responded with, 'I get it, we can just pretend this never happened.' Uhhhh, No the f*ck we can't, my dude."
7. "He tried to kiss me while we were hanging out one-on-one because his fiancée was sick and couldn’t make it. Then accused me of leading him on by hanging out one-on-one."
8. "In high school a friend was sent away for behavior/mental health issues for a few months. When he came back, one of his first messages to me was asking if he could eat me out because, 'it’s been a long time since he did it.' Never spoke again."
9. "He called my parents' house phone. I never gave him that number. I didn’t even know the number."
10. "He started asking increasingly invasive questions about where I was, who I was with, and what I was doing. When I tried to set boundaries, he blamed me for not being there for him enough (we had known each other maybe 2-3 weeks) and went off on me for 'leading him on.' When I told him I didn’t want to continue being friends, he cried that I was leaving him just like everyone else."
11. "He waited for me on my kids' trampoline in our yard when I wasn’t home. He lived in my neighborhood and strolled over earlier and wanted to hang out, but I said I was busy, got in my car and drove away in front of him. I assumed he’d walk home, but he didn’t! My other neighbor had a camera; he stayed there on my trampoline for 2.5 hours until I got home with my kids and then was upset I wouldn’t let him inside to hang out while I put them to bed."
12. "He wrote a love song about a girl described as looking exactly like me, sat down on my bed, and looked deep into my eyes as he sang it to me. When I politely told him this was really nice but I wasn't interested, he called me a conceited b*tch for assuming the song was about me."
13. "I was out to dinner with him and my husband. He told my husband that he was going to steal me away, and that if he had found me first, my husband would've never had a chance."
14. "He told me he loved me and tried to kiss me after his brother started flirting with me. I'd known him forever, told him everything like you would a female friend. There was never even a hint that he liked me."
15. "He offered to give me a ride to a game for a co-ed team I just joined (knew this guy from high school), and he told me the team goes out for dinner after, so I said I’d join. I found out no one was going for food but me and him because he made it up. Never called my dad to come pick me up so fast."
16. "He sent me pictures of his d*ck, in color and black and white, and asked me which one was better. Men honestly don’t understand how crushing it is when you think you’ve made a friend who respects you and actually likes you as a person, only to realize he’s just been biding his time to sleep with you."
17. And finally, "I had a 'nice guy' roommate at one point. He was always polite and cordial. My cat was ill, and spent a majority of the time in my room. I set up a pet camera in my room so I could keep an eye on her while I was at work. One day, I checked the camera and just so happened to see my "nice guy' roommate crawling out of my closet on all fours. That was fun."
Have you ever dealt with creepy or inappropriate behavior from a male friend? Share your stories in the comments.
Note: Responses have been edited for length/clarity.