The Donald Trump Collection

Donald Trump was criticized for his ill-fitting suit at the second Presidential Debate. But Donald Trump has his own clothing line! Surely this is a mistake! We went to The Donald J Trump Collection to peruse his fine wares!

The Suits

Via trump.com

Donald Trump's suits are sharp! And at only $165?? He is an American Hero. Let's click the link to check out --

Via amazon.com

What the hell is this? Amazon? Trump can't even afford an eCommerce page on his own site? The guy's worth billions of dollars! Also ...

WHY THE HELL IS THIS THE FIRST RESULT?

Via amazon.com

This is terrifying.

The Shirts

Via trump.com

Trump only wears the finest of thread counts of beautiful dress shirts. He is a big beautiful man. Let's check out these fine --

Come on.

Via amazon.com

It's the same damn site! Nothing has changed! And that gaping mask is still the first thing on the list! Still Amazon!

The Cufflinks

Via trump.com

These are high-end cufflinks. There is no doubting the quality, and Donald Trump brings the finest of --

Goddammit.

Via amazon.com

I feel a familiar attachment with this site, like I've been here many a time before.

The Eyewear

Via trump.com

My faith is really wavering here, Trump. Much like your voter base. Please God, don't be --

Le Sigh.

Via eyeglasses.com

Of course. When I want eyeglasses, I goto eyeglasses.com. No other site will do when I want my generic eyeglasses. Why go anywhere else? And the eyeglasses cost almost as much as the full suits! At least it ain't Amazon.

But what if I want the mask?

Via amazon.com

Its hollow gaze ... beckons me. What if I just click --

I Have Gazed Into A Portal to Hell.

Via amazon.com

Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here.

Pestilence.

Via amazon.com

War.

Via amazon.com

Famine.

Via amazon.com

Death.

Via amazon.com

Via trump.com

All these styles and more are available on the actual trump.com website! Have at it, and prepare for Lucifer's grasp if you want that beloved mask!

Credit to Emily Fleming (@FlemilyEming) for finding this gem of a site and the jokes. She's the best!