20 Things You Need If You're Pretty Much Obsessed With Bacon
Wake and bacon.
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1. A cookbook filled with 101 bacon-centric recipes so you can get more inspo for ways to eat the best food on Earth.
2. A microwave bacon tray to make cooking bacon as easy as laying it on this baby, popping it into the microwave, taking it out, and devouring it.
3. A bacon waffle maker that'll seriously upgrade your breakfast game from plain Jane waffles to waffles filled with delicious bacon bits. Talk about a great start to your morning.
4. A pair of slippers for when you wake up in the morning, get out of bed, and need something cozy on your feet (before proceeding to head to the kitchen to whip up some uhhh, BACON).
5. A heavy-duty bacon press to perfectly sear the good stuff, so you get restaurant-quality pieces every.single.time.
6. A 12-pack of chocolate covered bacon that'll make a great gift/treat for any bacon fanatic. Who can resist an A+ sweet/salty combo, or, for that matter, anything drenched in chocolate?
7. A bacon keeper for preserving the freshness of those slices you just couldn't cook up yet, but plan on doing so in the near future.
8. A subscription to The Baconarium to treat yourself to delicious artisan bacon each month. Are you salivating yet?
9. A pair of bacon stud earrings that'll ensure the sweet sounds of sizzling, crackling bacon is never far... just minus the sounds. You know, because they are earrings after all.
10. A bacon bowl maker for testing out the scientific theory about everything tasting better when it's eaten out of a bowl of bacon. Look, don't argue with science, ok?!
11. A jar of smoked bacon sea salt to sprinkle on every food you eat — because sometimes you don't have the time to whip up bacon, but still crave the smoky, salty flavor.
12. A jar of maple bacon onion jam that'll go great atop a burger, spread on sandwich bread, eaten with potatoes, and more. A lil' savory, a lil' sweet, a lot of yum.
13. A grease/cooking oil strainer for using once you're finished cooking up your bacon in the pan and need a safe place to pour the leftover grease — HINT! NOT IN YOUR SINK.
14. A glitter bacon Christmas ornament to get into the holiday spirit early with a decoration that makes you happier than a kid on Christmas morning.
15. A bacon beer cheese dip that'll become your new fave dip — no questions asked. But also, don't be surprised if you find yourself eating it by the spoonful more than using it as a dip, because it's just that good.
16. A bacon pattern comforter for those who wanna wrap themselves like a pig in a blanket at night and be all cozy and happy. Also get it? Pig in a blanket? Because bacon comes from pigs? Ok, sorry.
17. A pair of socks to put on your feetsies immediately if you really felt Ron Swanson when he spoke the iconic words "Give me all the bacon and eggs you have."
18. A bacon and maple syrup scented candle that'll fill your living space with the sweet, sweet scent of breakfast without needing to turn on the griddle.
19. A tee for showing those around you how you practice soothing self-care — who needs aromatherapy when you can just eat bacon?
20. A sticker to decorate your belongings with a photo of the love of your life, your best friend, the one who is there for you when no one else is, the one who will never let you down when all else fails.
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.