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18 Types Of People Who Make Queer People Say "Oh Boy"

Allies, PFLAG moms, flirtatious straights...the gang's all here!

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1. The "ally" who needs to tone it down ASAP.

Feel free to stay in your lane!
ithelpstodream.tumblr.com

Feel free to stay in your lane!

2. The person who wants you to know they think it's A SHAME that you're not straight.

ABC / Via hercampus.com

*implodes*

3. That relative who always makes sure to use the word "choice" when talking about your "lifestyle."

I see what you're doing, Janice.
Twitter: @solomongeorgio

I see what you're doing, Janice.

4. The coworker who's like, "Dating would be so much easier if I was a lesbian."

giphy.com / Via giphy.com

Yeah, totally. Queer people lead totally uncomplicated and problem-free love lives. Get into it!

5. Your doctor, who somehow can't make heads or tails of your sex life.

How do you, of all people, not get this?
ithelpstodream.tumblr.com

How do you, of all people, not get this?

6. That straight bestie who gets real handsy with you when they're drunk.

TBS / Via wifflegif.com

Sober: Straight as an arrow. Two drinks in: Determined to make out with you.

7. That new acquaintance who thinks it's a compliment to tell you that you "pass" for straight.

There are just so many levels to address here. Till we have time to go through all of them, just do one thing — make this a private thought you keep in your head.
instagram.com

There are just so many levels to address here. Till we have time to go through all of them, just do one thing — make this a private thought you keep in your head.

8. That one comedian who's like "LGBTQ....LMNOP. Alphabet soup, amirite?"

No, you're not right. Shush.
Twitter: @mrbenjaminlaw

No, you're not right. Shush.

9. White all-gays-matter gays.

Now's not the time, Morgan. In fact, it'll never be the time. Shh.
Twitter: @thesaddestangel

Now's not the time, Morgan. In fact, it'll never be the time. Shh.

10. The parent who, since you came out, keeps reminding you that it could just be a phase.

reddit.com

Don't hold your breath, k, Dad?

11. And also the really extra pride mom.

She's here, her kid is queer, and she WILL be on a float at Pride.
overenthusiasticpflagmother.tumblr.com

She's here, her kid is queer, and she WILL be on a float at Pride.

12. That guy who just wants to understand "how you have sex."

Flo Perry / Via buzzfeed.com

It's actually really complicated and you wouldn't get it.

13. The totally unabashed public starer.

If you're not concealing your staring at least a little bit, you're not upholding your end of the social contract.
trekupmysleeve.tumblr.com

If you're not concealing your staring at least a little bit, you're not upholding your end of the social contract.

14. The relative who's constantly making it awkward.

Carol, what are you not understanding here?
@puhevika / Via instagram.com

Carol, what are you not understanding here?

15. And the relative who surprises you by being really accepting.

*weeps tears of joy*
reddit.com

*weeps tears of joy*

16. That person who's totally stumped that you're not one or the other.

Sigh.
@gayafclub / Via instagram.com

Sigh.

17. That friend who thinks they're going to heaven because they have a gay friend or two.

Logo / Via logotv.tumblr.com

Do we make you a better person? Maybe. Should you brag about it? No.

18. And, of course, the acquaintance who's like, "Who's the man in your relationship?"

giphy.com

Let's unpack this, starting with WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT AND WHY DO YOU THINK IT'S OK TO ASK THAT??

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