This Is How Lesbians Have Sex

Because lesbian sex in porn is just weird.

Posted on May 13, 2015, 17:04 GMT

Flo Perry

BuzzFeed Staff, UK

Step 1: Take off your lesbian attire.

Step 2: Talk about your feelings.

Step 3: Get yourself some scissors.

The bigger the better.

Advertisement

Step 4: Cut your bra right off.

This is known as "scissoring".

Step 5: Burn your bras.

This is a sacrifice in the name of misandry.

Step 6: Hold hands, but not for too long.

Step 7: Introduce your cats. (You can hold hands if you feel the urge.)

Advertisement

Step 8: Get out the biggest dildos you own.

If you don't own a dildo you can improvise with vegetables or television remote controls.

Step 9: Swordfight with your dildos.

There are no winners and losers in sex, remember, it's all about getting to know each other.

Step 10: High-five your gal pal! You did it!

Step 11: Remember to put back on your lesbian attire, and you might need to buy a new bra.

So now the age-old mystery of how lesbians have sex is finally solved! You're welcome.