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1. WOD dice for randomized workouts
A roll of these dice generates a random workout! Put CrossFit's claim that it prepares athletes "not only for the unknown but for the unknowable" to the test.
2. Smartphone mount for recording any lift or movement
Triple unders: Vid or it didn't happen.
3. Handmade ceramic kettlebell (to drink from)
What are you going to do, sip Bulletproof coffee not out of a kettlebell?
4. The bible for all things mobility and injury prevention
Injury prevention for the hardest working CrossFitter.
5. Kettlebell necklace, for the accessorizing athlete
6. The ol' snatch double entendre tee
And by the way, the snatch is a kind of barbell lift...why, what were you thinking?
7. Jump rope of one's own
The perfect way to congratulate someone for getting double unders (i.e. skipping the jump rope twice in a single jump), or maybe help them summon good double under mojo.
8. Glittery bacon ornament
Is your Christmas tree paleo?
9. Cookbook for the athlete with a primal appetite
Guides, meal plans, and recipes, hold the refined sugar, legumes, grains, and inflammation.
10. Recovery kit for the achy, breaky CrossFitter
The post-workout soreness your CrossFitter has mentioned a few (dozen) times? This will help (with the soreness, not the mentioning).
11. Bulletproof beans for coffee-lovers
Just add grass-fed butter for a frothy morning brew that promises to enhance cognitive function and boost metabolism.
12. Super deluxe blender bottle for pre- and post-workout fuel
With compartments for protein powder, nuts, dried fruit, and other small snacks.
13. Matching tees for you and your workout buddy
Helps WOD partners stay warm between partner WODs.
14. Balm to heal bar- and barbell-ravaged palms
Pull-up practice may win the battle (against the palms), but not the war.
15. A tank with a sentiment everyone can get behind
Seriously. Furpees can buck all the way off.
16. Kettlebell that mean mugs back
He's watching your form.
17. iPhone case that pays homage to CrossFit's most infamous WOD
Does it get more hellish than a workout than consists of a total of 45 95-pound barbell thrusters and 45 pull-ups, all performed as quickly as possible? Probably not. That workout's name? Fran.
Keep your enemies close.
18. Necklace with an important reminder
For the lover of lifting who wants to keep a bumper plate on them at all times.
19. One t-shirt to rule them all
Finally a clever CrossFit t-shirt that shows all those other clever CrossFit t-shirt who's boss by taking the whole thing meta.
20. Knee-high socks that speak their mind
Never another rope climb burn, deadlift scrape, or box jump wound.
21. Toy barbell for the tiniest future CrossFitter you know
Kids are blank whiteboards--er, slates--so get 'em started young!
22. Gift set of paleo-friendly nut butters
Quadruple Nut Power, Pumpkin Spice Power, and Pure Almond Power. Enough said.
23. Paleo meal delivery subscription
Choose from regular- or "warrior"-size portions.
24. CrossFit lifestyle magazine subscription
GentleCrossFitter's Quarterly, kind of.
25. Journal for tracking any/all WOD data
Let no rep go un-jotted.
26. Bath product that soothes muscles
Recovery never felt so Calgon.
27. Sweet and savory snacks for paleo enthusiasts newbie or diehard
All the jerky.
We've added a link to entry #2, the smartphone mount. Thanks to commenter Ariana Duax for letting us know it was missing.
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