Book Review: Modern Romance By Aziz Ansari: As Told By Ryan

Aziz Ansari has been a well known comic for some time now. Recently, Ansari played Tom Haverford in Parks and Recreation as well as the voice of Darryl, in Bob’s Burgers. “Spend more time with people, less time in front of a screen, and—since we’re all in it together—be nice to people.” Dating has changed dramatically over the years with the introduction of new technology. No longer a get married to your high school sweetheart type of life but more of a take your time approach. A new-age, contemporary book that tackles the complications and etiquette of modern dating today.

Modern Romance is a research book written by Aziz Ansari, published on June 16, 2015. It is also written with New York University Professor, Eric Klinenberg. I find this book very interesting because I was not expecting the content to be coming from a well-known author/actor in America. It is not everyday you read a book about statistics and data coming from a mainstream comedian. This book follows the data on a sociological perspective with a comedic twist through the view of a heterosexual male. Let me set the record strait: Modern Romance is not a comedy book. This book takes you on a journey through data research on the changes with dating today and how technology has completely revolutionized this process. Centuries ago, it was common for someone to look no further than their own neighborhood to find the one they would end up marrying. As long as they were nice and were not a murderer it was a match made in heaven, often time married before the age of 22.. In modern dating people have the use of the internet, cell phones and social media to provide them with many options outside of their neighborhood. Today, people spend years and years trying to find their soulmate. As a married man myself, things have changed quite drastically even in the past 6 years I have been in a relationship. Modern Romance takes us on an interesting excursion, even making stops to different cultures for assessment on the different tactics used when finding significant others or partners. The journey in this book is not how all people are when it comes to dating but rather the trends in people in their late 20s and 30s who have a period of what the book calls an "emerging adulthood".

Highlights and Criticisms

Photograph: Reed Young for the Guardian

Some of the criticism that this book has received has been simply based on the fact that Aziz Ansari is a comedian and not an expert on this topic. There have been other comedians such as Steve Harvey and even Bill Cosby that have dove into this genre. But unlike these other comedians, Ansari teams up with a sociologist to fill the book with facts and focus group research to give it a serious take. What makes this book interesting is that Ansari has actually never participated in the online dating world. He brings light to that in one quote, “As a public figure, I have never considered doing any online dating. I always figured there was a chance someone who was a stalker type would use it as an opportunity to kidnap and murder me… Maybe my stalker (probably an Indian dude) sees my profile and thinks, Oh, here’s that comedian guy on OkCupid. FINALLY, I have a way to reach out to him and slowly plot his murder. He sends me a message pretending to be a woman. I see the profile. ‘She’ likes tacos and Game of Thrones. I’m very excited.” Some wonder if it is meant to be scholarly about the mating outline in the world today. The fact that Ansari left out his co-writer on the front of the book seems to show that the book is focusing on Ansari and not the research and facts the book presents. Personally, pairing the sociologist and the comedian is a great idea in my opinion but the facts did not seem very original. Although, the comic twist definitely made the book easy to read.

How Does This Book Connect To The Course Content?

Relating Modern Romance to some of the course content can be very challenging. While reading the book I could not help but think of one question in the book Questions of Character, Are these really my dreams? Reading through the story and seeing all these facts I wonder if its really better in the dating world with all this technology in modern day romance. We can only speculate about how each person views their dreams and what they do for themselves to get there. Did the dreams not exist as much back then? Where there less opportunities? We will never really know, but assessing oneself and getting to the root of your dreams will help you figure out what you want in life.

Conclusion

Although this book is not a classic it does have some interesting statistics and different views on the culture of romance and dating. I would definitely recommend this book, especially if you are an Aziz Ansari fan, if you are looking for a different view on dating with a comedic touch. It is backed researched so you do not feel as if the book is inaccurate. It is definitely a quality read. I give it a 7.3/10.

Works Cited

The Problem with Aziz Ansari Writing a Book About ... (n.d.). Retrieved October 24, 2016, from http://splitsider.com/2015/06/the-problem-with-aziz-ansari-writing-a-book-about-something-hes-never-done/

Modern Romance review – a refreshing male take on sex ... (n.d.). Retrieved October 24, 2016, from https://www.theguardian.com/books/2015/jun/22/modern-romance-aziz-ansari-review-male-view-of-sex

'Modern Romance:' Love In The Age Of Demography : NPR. (n.d.). Retrieved October 24, 2016, from http://www.npr.org/2015/06/17/414616936/modern-romance-love-in-the-age-of-demography