Skip To Content

    Real-Life Couples Are Sharing The Small But Impactful Rituals They Do With One Another To Create Closeness

    "It helps us both shake off the seriousness of our lives and act like we're 16 again."

    One of the best things about being in a relationship with someone is creating one-of-a-kind rituals that only you and your partner do to show how much you love one another. And since February — the month of love — is just around the corner, I thought it would be sweet to see how people answered this Reddit thread by Reddit user u/sparklythrowaway101: "What is a ritual or tradition you have with your partner, and how does it create emotional intimacy with each other?" Here's what they had to say:

    a couple being cute outside

    1. "Every Sunday evening, without fail, we come together and plan out our week. She plans all of the meals she’s going to cook, her baking schedule, dance schedule, and work schedule. I plan out my class assignments, basketball practices, games, travel, art time, etc. It’s so great having someone who thrives off of a schedule the same way I do. I always look forward to Sundays because of that."

    "We do it all at the same time at the same table. We use individual planners but still share a Google doc so we can keep track of everything. The fun is in the scheduling but also in getting sidetracked and laughing over something so out of the left field. Then we have to eventually reign ourselves in and finish."


    2. "We make up silly dances for each TV show intro that we watch that we do together every time. I guess it's our way of being silly together, not an easy thing to achieve when you work and have kids! Helps us both shake off the seriousness of our lives and act like we're 16 again."

    a family having a silly dance in their living room

    3. "This is something my S.O. actually learned from Reddit (he Basically, it’s for men who are the quiet type, or at least for men who aren’t good at displaying affection or sharing their emotions. He’ll squeeze my hand three times, which is a non-verbal way of saying 'I love you.' So ever since then, we will occasionally do it to each other when holding hands or just embracing. It’s become a very normal yet casual part of our everyday lives."


    4. "We take baths together. We have a huge jacuzzi tub that could fit four, so he and I take advantage of the space and use it to just hang out, unwind, get close, and enjoy the company. When I moved in, he had never used it, now we use it once or twice a week together."

    a couple in a bath together

    5. "Every single morning that my partner is home, he makes a coffee for me and wakes me up when it's ready, he does this even if I have to be awake at 5 a.m. and even if he doesn't have any plans. He will wake up before me without fail so I can wake up to coffee made exactly how I like it. Something I do for him is I always have some form of baked good in the fridge for him when he comes home — it can be cookies, cupcakes, etc. There's always something made with love for him, waiting."


    6. "Dance parties. If one dances, the other one has to dance too regardless of what they're doing."


    7. "Whenever new video games come out, we usually both take time to just play in each other’s presence. Sometimes this means setting up TVs right next to each other, lol. Just being able to enjoy our individual time but still be near each other is really nice."

    a couple playing video games together

    8. "We go on 'dates' to Costco. Lol."


    9. "Whenever one of us gets home from work, we always take time to cuddle for 5 or 10 minutes. Helps us get into a cozy head space and out of work mode. We'll talk about work and the stress we've got going on there and then start making dinner together."

    a couple cuddling on the couch together with a blanket

    10. "We play thumb wars. Every time we hold hands, I always trap his thumb under mine and go '1, 2, 3. I win.' Then we tussle for a bit before settling back to hand-holding."


    11. "We call tasks 'dates' and do a little cheer before we do it. The more mundane the task, the better. For example, if we need to do laundry we will cheer 'laundry date, laundry date, laundry date' to hype ourselves up and make it a fun thing to do together instead of a boring chore."

    a couple having fun while doing laundry

    12. "My fiancé gets up earlier than me — hours earlier — so around the time I wake up most mornings, he comes into the bedroom and gets back in bed so we can cuddle together for a while. I didn’t think it would become a regular thing but now I feel weird getting up if he hasn’t come in yet!"


    13. "We have weekly check-ins. Usually in bed. Just like pillow talk, but we check in with each other to see if there’s anything that needs to be addressed, or just to express gratitude. It can be really quick, or emotional. I love it."

    a couple in bed talking with one another

    14. "Our nightly routine is to shower together and lie in bed together talking about our days or whatever we're scrolling through on our phones. We are also able to sleep very close without discomfort and it's amazing."


    15. "My husband starts work at 2 a.m. so he’s usually in bed by 7 p.m. but I don’t get home from work until 6 p.m., so I’ll grab a bite to eat and watch an episode of whatever series we are watching and I’ll scratch his back and he’ll cuddle me until he goes to sleep, then I’ll turn off the TV and go about the rest of my day. I also always call him in the am after I drop the kids off at school and am on my home to tell him about what we have going on in the day and he’ll time how he slept, how work is going, etc."

    couple laughing while watching tv

    16. "I am a morning person; my husband is not. When the alarm goes off, I roll over and we cuddle for a few minutes before I go to the bathroom. When I come back, I throw his robe over him and say 'plop.' It's silly, but the morning feels wrong without it."

    17. "Wednesdays are our day. We focus on each other that day. No planning with anyone else."


    18. "Before bed every night we’ll lay down on our sides, heads on pillows, facing each other, and just look into each other’s eyes for a few seconds. Usually by then, we are also smiling at each other. It’s like a mindfulness thing but doing this before bed helps us unplug from our devices and also just feel grateful for this moment and for each other and the life we’ve built together. Then we shift positions & he gives me his shoulder/arm as a pillow and we go to sleep. I love this ritual we have. I love having his face be the last thing I see before I close my eyes. It’s really helped us keep the honeymoon phase alive when we’ve been married for over a year and a half."

    a couple looking at each other

    Do you have a unique ritual or tradition that you do with your partner? If so, tell us what it is in the comments below.