Some Questions For The New Girl Scout Cookie

    The Girl Scouts are selling a new cookie this year. We chatted with the exotic Mango Creme With NutriFusion™ to learn more about it.

    Meet the newest addition to the Girl Scout Cookie troop: Mango Creme With Nutrifusion™. This is a cookie that promises exciting things.

    But who, really, can say that they know the true Mango Creme With NutriFusion™? It is a cookie full of secrets and mysteries. We sat down with the cookie to learn more.

    BuzzFeed: Tell us, what is NutriFusion™?

    Mango Creme With NutriFusion™:

    NutriFusion™ is a delicious new way to get your vitamins! Like I said.

    Q: But, like, what...IS it?

    A:

    Oh, you know, nutrients from natural whole food concentrate. As I state in my ingredients list, these include "cranberry, pomegranate, orange, grape, strawberry, shiitake mushrooms."

    Q: Wait, you're made out of shiitake mushrooms?

    A:

    Don't even worry about it.

    Q: OK, well, how much mango is inside of you?

    A:

    Zero mango. My ingredients do not, in fact, include mango or any mango-derived substances. I do, however, include "the taste of mango"!

    Q: So, are you at least *good* for me?

    A:

    No trans fats, hydrogenated oils, or preservatives — just pure island delight!

    Q: How many calories are there in "pure island delight"?

    A:

    There are 180 calories in a serving of pure island delight. A serving is three cookies.

    Q: So you're actually less healthy than, say, shortbread Girl Scout Cookies?

    A:

    THIS INTERVIEW IS OVER.